Normal For The Spider
by NickandLiv
Summary: What happens when a very dangerous man is hell bent on revenge and how does it affect the lives of Olivia and her family? And, will more secrets come to light? This is a sequel to Tangled Webs and it is highly recommended that you read it before beginning this story so that you understand the history of certain aspects. Rated M for content. (sex, rape and violence) Langson
1. Prologue

**You guys wanted it, you got it; the sequel is here. Let me start off by saying that I never expected the response I got from Tangled Webs and I certainly never expected that you guys would want a sequel – there are no words for how amazing you all are and how amazing you all make me feel so thank you, each of you, from the bottom of my heart. Dick wolf owns what he owns, the rest is mine. Enjoy!**

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**Prologue**

**...**

_While doing sit-ups in his jail cell, he kept his eyes on what had gotten him through this sentence - staring at the 5 pictures on his wall. They were the only things that adorned the white painted brick, the only things that had ever adorned it. Ten years. He had been in this rotten hellhole for ten years all thanks to those stupid, useless whores! Life was good, happy and carefree and then suddenly they'd convinced her to file charges – his own fucking wife allowed those prissy, man-hating bitches to brainwash her; to cry abuse, to cry rape and they even managed to convince the fucking judge!_

"_Ball busting sluts!" he said as he came up for the 200__th__ time and rested his elbows on his knees, done with his sit-ups _

"_A man has the goddamn right to do whatever the fuck he wants to his wife!" he angrily said out loud to himself._

_In ten years he hadn't let go of the rage. They'd taken everything – including his son. He hadn't seen his boy in 10 years; the stupid cunt divorced him the minute he was sentenced – more brainwashing from those bitter twats, then she disappeared; took his fucking kid and disappeared; probably turned his boy into a fucking pansy! But he'd done his time; ten years of hard time, time during which his buddies on the outside begged him to say the word but no, he had to settle these scores himself and he'd been preparing by taking full advantage of the prison gym getting bigger, stronger, ready. Now he'd soon be free; free to make them all pay – the wife, the cop, the doctor, the judge and the lawyer… they'd be begging for death by the time he was done with them and their begging would not be in vain!_

"_You cunts are gonna be sorry you ever fucked with me!" he promised while staring with vile contempt at their pictures and an evil smile spread across his lips._

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**Are we intrigued?**


	2. One Big Happy

**SO I SEE THE INTRO GOT YOU GUYS BUZZING, THANK YOU GUYS! HERE IS CHAPTER ONE AND AS YOU NOTICE IT'LL BE SWEET – THE CALM BEFORE THE… WELL YOU GET THE IDEA. LOTS OF LANGSON FAMILY FLUFF FOR THIS CHAPTER. DICK WOLF OWNS WHAT'S HIS, ENJOY!**

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**Apparently there's been some misunderstandings about the children's names so I'm adding this to clear that up. The twins are Caden James - who's nicknamed Jamie. And there's Adrienne Grace - who's nicknamed Drew. There are not two sets of twins, lol. Sorry for the confusion.**

**.**

**LANGAN HOME**

Things were peaceful on this summer morning. Bluebirds were singing mellifluously outside as the sun began to rise and cast its beautiful light on what would be another perfect summer day. The children were, for now fast asleep while Trevor and Olivia were just starting to rouse from their slumber. 6:12am, Trevor was the first to open his eyes and as he had done every morning since they'd been together, he looked over at his beautiful wife and smiled still unable to believe how completely blessed he was; he was married to the woman of his dreams – the woman who had stolen his heart upon first sight. Never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined the life they'd have together – a happy marriage, beautiful children, and it only seemed to get better with each passing day.

Olivia shifted, nestling against his body and smiling before she opened her eyes and looked up at her husband; she loved waking up beside him. _This is really my life. S_he thought as she snuggled closer and breathed him in as her hand reached up to playfully scratch the briskly stubble on his face.

"Good morning beautiful!" he smiled as he looked down at her.

"Good morning" she said as she kissed him.

"Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?" she wondered

"Excactly. Silence, which means the kids are still asleep"

"And you were thinking…"

"I was thinking…" he began as he moved on top of her and positioned himself between her thighs "That since you were too tired last night…"

"You wanna make up for lost time?" she smiled as she ran her fingers through his short hair

"…if you're up for it"

"I can see that you are" she teased at feeling his erection pushing against her mound. She was already growing wet.

"So that's a yes?"

"Always a yes!" she said before he lowered his mouth on to hers and greedily claimed a searing kiss, she quickly parting her lips to allow his tongue to enter as she wrapped her legs around him. He had lined himself up to her entrance and was pushing into her when suddenly the doors to their bedroom flew open and the twins ran inside bright eyed and energized, startling their parents who quickly disengaged and sat up in bed, grinning at each other red-faced as Trevor quickly readjusted his pajama pants. Kids were a definite libido killer!

"Mommy, Daddy!"The three-year-old toddlers cried gleefully as they anxiously climbed onto their parents bed.

"Good morning munchkins!" Olivia smiled as she pulled Jamie onto her lap and kissed him Drew stood up, wrapping her arms around her mother's neck and kissing her cheek.

"Morning mama" Drew cooed softly in Olivia's ear, eliciting a smile and a kiss from her mother before she turned her attention to her father, all while Jamie sat contentedly in Olivia's arms, his head resting comfortably upon her chest.

"Mama, guess what?" he asked quietly, looking up at Olivia while Drew busied herself with trying to perch her stuffed gorilla on top of Trevor's head.

"What baby?" Olivia asked sweetly as she looked down at her son who was a carbon copy of her; he'd inherited his mother's big brown eyes, dark hair, beautiful tan skin and all her features while Adrienne on the other hand had taken completely after her father, except for her nose which was strictly Olivia's.

"Tomorrow we're three!" Drew blurted out, spoiling her brother's announcement

"I wanted to tell it!' Jamie whined

"It's my birthday too!" Drew whined in return

"Hey, guys, how about we not argue so early in the morning?" Trevor interjected then looked over at his wife who was suddenly, urgently moving Caden from her lap. He recognized that look on her face and quickly reached over to take their son as Olivia pushed the covers away from her body and ran for the bathroom covering her mouth.

"Daddy?" Jamie called to Trevor, alarmed at his mother's behavior

"It's ok buddy, mommy's just not feeling well" he assured his son as he kissed his head and put him down beside his sister on the bed. "I want you to stay right here with your sister while I check on her ok?"

"Ok" the twins agreed in unison

"Stop talking like me!" Drew ordered her brother

"I didn't!"

"Guys…"

"Sorry" again in unison as Trevor headed to he and Olivia's bathroom.

...

Trevor walked in to find Olivia heaving into the toilet as she gripped the bowl. She could hear his footsteps on the cold marble floor but she didn't look up or turn around. Instead she took a deep breath through her nose, aggravating her nausea and threw up again while Trevor kneeled beside her and held her hair back with one hand while rubbing soothing circles on her back with the other.

"This brings back memories"

"Damn you!" she said weakly, her head still leaned over the bowl

"You think it's that?" he asked

"I know it is" she assured him before she closed the lid and flushed. He couldn't keep the smile from his face. "I thought I might be for a few days now, I picked up a test last night on my way home, I was gonna take it this morning" she said as she leaned against the wall.

"Are you…if it's positive, are you okay about it? I mean…"

"Am I okay? Baby, I might be carrying our child - or children if we get a repeat of last time" she managed a smile "I'm more than okay… just not looking forward to the morning sickness" she said and with the back of her hand, wiped the beads of sweat that had formed on her forehead.

"What a way to start the day!" he grinned just as the twins entered the room."

"Daddy" Adrienne called waving the monitor in the air while Caden went to his mother who was still sitting on the floor resting on the wall and sat beside her.

"Mama you ok?" he asked

"I'm fine baby, I just have a tummy ache. Why don't you go with daddy to check on your brother?"

"Okay." He said before leaning in and kissing her stomach. "All better?" he asked as he stood. She couldn't help but laugh

"All better Munchkin." she still didn't move to get up as she fought the urge to heave

"I'll take the kids down and start breakfast you gonna be ok?" Trevor asked

"Baby…"

"Okay, okay" he relented with a smile, knowing how she hated when he fussed over her but he was too excited to hold back. "Come on you two" he said as he took the twins by the hands and left the room with them then popped his head back into the bathroom "I love you"

...

Down the hall in the nursery, Trevor walked in to see their youngest child standing up in his crib and smiling happily, his little arms reaching eagerly for his father while his brother and sister played on the other side of the room.

"Hey little man" Trevor cooed as he lifted the 13 month old from the crib and kissed his head. "You're up early"

"Da!" Noah exclaimed with a grin as if in agreeance before leaning in and planting a slobbery, open mouthed kiss on Trevor's chin and apparently deciding that he liked the taste so he continued to gnaw on it while humming enthusiastically causing Trevor to laugh.

"Dude, we talked about this, you can't eat dad's face" Noah stopped, pulled back and looked at his father quite seriously for a moment before letting out a joyous squeal and going back to slobbering on Trevor's chin.

Noah had definitely been a surprise for he and Olivia. Ten months ago a young woman that Olivia had been helping to get her life together was killed, leaving a then three month old Noah alone in the world with no family to care for him. It had come as a complete shock to them that the young woman had left a will stating that in the event of her death, Noah should be given to Olivia if she would agree to have him; of course she did agree, she and Trevor both did without a second thought even though they already had a couple of very rambunctious almost-two-year-olds at the time in addition to their work schedules but neither of them could fathom he thought of turning the infant away and placing him into the system. Noah was given to them and they legally adopted the child as their own after just a few months.

Now, almost year later, they had their perfect family which was soon to be made even more perfect by the addition of their new baby – he was already in love with the idea of having another and prayed that the test would be positive.

"What do you think buddy?" he said softly to Noah "You want a baby brother or a baby sister?"

Noah babbled something incoherently, finally done chewing his father's chin and now happily patting his chubby hands against Trevor's cheeks.

"Me too" Trevor smiled as if understanding his son "But for now, we'll keep it between us; come on guys, let's go make breakfast" he called to the twins who jumped up from what they were doing.

"Waffles!" they cried in unison as they four of them left the nursery.

...

A bit later in the kitchen, the children were seated around the table having breakfast while Trevor stood at the counter sipping coffee, in awe at the sight of his children. With the way he loved their mother, he didn't think it was possible to love deeper but then they'd come along and proven him wrong – they were his life and right now, with the prospect of another on the way, he couldn't help but think of Chloe and wished that he and Olivia had gotten to shower their firstborn with the love and adoration they gave her brothers and sister.

"Daydreaming again?" he heard Olivia say and looked up to see her in her robe, walking over to the kitchen table.

"Hey" he replied nervously as he sat his mug down on the counter.

"Hey big boy!" she cooed happily to Noah as she stroked his dark hair before picking him up from his high chair and snuggling him; the twins were at an age now where they didn't care too much for being held unlessbthey were in the mood for it. But she could snuggle her little guy all day and he'd never complain or fuss to be put down after just a few seconds.

"ma ma!" he said as he put a cheerio into her mouth and began clapping his hands as he giggled and she smothered his face with kisses while trying to ignore the queasiness she felt.

"So, did you…" Trevor asked from where he stood.

"I did" Olivia answered in a non-indicative tone as she continued playing with Noah, making faces at him. Trevor waited tortuously for her to say more but she kept her attention focused on their little one, reveling in the sound of his laughter, knowing that her silence on the subject was driving Trevor nuts.

"And?!" he asked anxiously, knowing that she was doing this purposely to make him crazy.

"Oh. Right." She mused, taking her time to put Noah back in his high chair and then kissing all three of her babies before taking her time to walk across the room to where Trevor stood. "Do we have any ginger ale?" she asked coyly

"If you're trying to make me lose my mind, it's working" he confessed, making her laugh as he took her hands in his own before pulling her into his arms. "glad you find it funny" he said while looking down at her.

"I'm sorry baby" she apologized "here" she said as she took something from the pocket of her robe and gave it to him.

"What's this?" he asked

"The reason I'm gonna throw up again!" she said, looking a pale shade of green as she quickly turned and threw up in the sink. He looked over at her then own at what she'd put into his hand and was beyond thrilled when he looked at the little screen on the test stick and saw that beautiful little word staring back at him.

_Pregnant._

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**Soooo… you like the fluff? Diggin the Langson family dynamic? Not liking the fluff or the dynamic? Talk to me. Next chapter, we unfluff a bit. See y'all then!**


	3. And So, It Begins

**BACK AGAIN. I SEE THAT MANY OF YOU WERE VERY HAPPY TO SEE NOAH INCLUDED IN THE STORY; I THOUGHT HE'D BE A GOOD FIT TO THE LANGAN DYNAMIC AND I'M SO GLAD YOU ALL AGREED WITH MY DECISION. SO, JUST WANT TO SAY THAT THE STORY BEGINS TO DARKEN IN THIS CHAPTER AND AS FUTURE CHAPTERS POST, IT ONLY GETS DARKER SO IF THAT'S NOT FOR YOU, PLEASE EXCUSE YOURSELF FROM READING. THANKS YOU TO THOSE OF YOU WHO TAKE THE TIME TO LEAVE REVIEWS AND TELL ME HOW I'M DOING, I REALLY APPRECIATE THE FEEDBACK AND AM GRATEFUL TO EVERYONE WHO'S READING. THAT BEING SAID, DICK WOLF OWNS THE SVU CHARACTERS, I OWN MINE, ENJOY!**

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**I thought since I'd done reader comments in Tangled webs, I'b begin including them her as well so...**

**LaceNLeather24 chapter 2 . Jul 15**

**I'm loving the family fluff, and I like that you added Noah to the mix! I can't wait for more of this wonderful story. I hope to see Alex and Brian soon with their family!**

No worries, your beloved Cassidy clan will return very soon!

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**One week later…**

"Okay, we're off to the park" Trevor announced upon entering the living room where Olivia was lying on the sofa while Noah sat happily in his playpen, concentrating on chewing the life out of the teething ring in his mouth while drool poured down his chin. Even with Trevor's mother here taking the kids off their hands for the past week, just like with the twins, her morning sickness lasted through the day and she was too tired for anything more than lying down when she wasn't working and even that required great effort lately. This bothered her because she had just made Lieutenant six months ago and didn't want it to appear that the job was too much for her and she knew that she'd have to disclose her pregnancy sooner than she'd planned so that the brass would know that her fatigue wasn't fueled from being overwhelmed by her new position.

"You sure you can handle all three?" Olivia asked

"Honey, I'm super dad, I got this. And don't worry about lunch, I'll feed them and have them back in time for their nap" he said as he bent down and kissed her before going to pick up Noah. "I love you"

"I love you too; you might wanna get back to the car before they free themselves and drive away."

"Probably a good idea. Noah, say bye bye"

"byebye mama" he said , waving his hand in an open-close motion then stuck his teething ring back in his mouth

"Get some rest" Trevor said to Olivia before kissing her again then turning to leave. He got to the open front door and paused, turning around to look at Olivia. "You think maybe we could...I mean if you're up to it" he asked. She suddenly got up and ran from the room with her hand to her stomach.

"So is that a no?' he yelled

"No no no no no" Noah babbled, shaking his head. Trevor laughed at his son, kissing his head as they walked out the door.

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Over at the sixteenth, Fin was just finishing a phone call at his desk when Rollins entered the squad room carrying coffee and a redbull.

""Fin, you alright?" Nick asked while Amanda sat the energy drink in front of him, thanking her as she then proceeded to put one of the coffees down on her partner's desk.

"Yeah, you look upset" Amanda noted

"We gotta head out" Fin informed the two younger detectives

"Okay… that still doesn't explain…" Amanda said as she took a seat at her own desk across from Fin.

"I'm familiar with the address; I better call Liv."

"She's off today" Nick reminded

"Trust me, she'll wanna know about this!"

...

"Sweetie, do you feel like eating a little something?" Tricia asked Olivia who was now sitting out by the pool dangling her feet in the cool water while one of their two-year-old Bullmastiffs, Semper, lay beside her, her head in Olivia's lap and the other, Jax, lay under an oak tree happily playing with a ball.

"Not yet" Olivia answered, sickened by just the thought. She hadn't thrown up since Trevor had left over an hour ago and didn't want to do anything that might induce it.

"How about I get you some ginger ale?"

"Thank you please."

"I'll be right back with it; Sergeant Tutuola's on the phone, he says he needs to talk with you" she said as she handed Olivia the phone

"Thanks Tricia. Semper, Jax inside" Olivia called to the dogs as she took the receiver and Tricia made her way back inside, both dogs having gotten up and followed her. "Fin, it's my day off, this had better be important" she said upon answering.

"You remember Jessica Morgan?"

"Of course, husband's doing 15 for attempt 2"

"Yeah well, we just got a call to her address and it doesn't sound good, me and Rollins are headin over."

"When you say not good…?" Olivia asked, hoping that it wouldn't be what she already knew it was.

"187" Fin listened as Olivia released a pained sigh. Ten years ago, Jessica was 20 and had been put through hell by her ex husband. He'd used her as a punching bag and a sex toy since she'd gotten involved with him at the age of 17, but it wasn't until he'd almost killed her that she finally saw the light and decided to prosecute and rid herself of him as soon as he was put away. Olivia and Fin had both kept in touch with her over the years and she'd done a great job at rebuilding her life. Now, to hear that she'd possibly…

"I need to get changed, I'll meet you at the scene"

"Liv, you don't have to-"

"Yeah Fin, I do.' She said sorrowfully, her stomach suddenly feeling even sicker "I'll see you soon" she said before hanging up the phone then gathered her dress before pulling her legs from the pool, getting up from where she sat and went inside.

...

It was less than an hour before Olivia arrived at the crime scene where Fin and Amanda were already gathered with CSU and the team from the ME's office.

"What do we got?" she asked as she made her way into the bedroom of the small apartment, the walls of which were spattered with blood along with the furniture, curtains and floor a scene that sent shivers through her.

"Liv, you don't wanna-" Fin tried, wanting to spare her from seeing what he'd witnessed, knowing that it would affect her deeply.

"Fin please, this is my job" she said quickly as she squatted beside the blood-soaked sheet that concealed the body and lifted it to reveal a beaten, broken face, sickened to see Jessica's lifeless green eyes staring back at her; tears immediately springing to her eyes

"Neighbors say they heard screams last night" Amanda said

"and nobody bothered to call 911" Olivia said angrily, never taking her eyes away from Jessica.

"Didn't wanna get involved." The young blonde said with disgust "wasn't until her mother got here this morning that the body was found. She was so distraught she had to be taken to the hospital, Nick's there with her."

"She's been dead at least 10 hours. There are fluids in and on her as well as tearing to the vaginal and anal canals" Melinda began

"She was raped?" Olivia asked, more a statement than a question, not even understanding why she'd bothered with it.

"Raped and severely beaten all before her throat was slit and she was stabbed repeatedly in the chest, back and stomach – I can count at least 37 stab wounds; bastard damn near eviscerated her." she continued as Olivia took a deep breath "She fought hard, look at her hands"

"Cuts to her palms, fingernails torn off…" Olivia said as she inspected Jessica's right hand, holding it gently in her own as she felt bile rising.

"She was alive when he slit her throat"

"Liv…you okay?" Fin asked, noticing the look on his lieutenant's face

"Yeah, I'm…" she started, feeling the nausea churning; on top of the morning sickness, she was literally being made ill by seeing this young woman that she'd fought so hard for lying here, slaughtered like an animal. "I want this bastard found yesterday!" she said to her officers as she stood, hurt and anger evident in her voice. She put her hand to her stomach and excused herself, leaving the apartment. Amanda looked on, her own emotion welling up; she had never seen Olivia come apart like this before and looked to Fin for some reassurance.

"I got it." he said and went after Olivia.

...

By the time he'd gotten outside, he found Olivia hunched over the back of one of the squad cars and throwing up; he didn't hesitate to go to her.

"Easy" he said softly, putting a hand to her back while passing her a handkerchief with the other.

"Thank you" she said graciously as she took the cloth and wiped her mouth. Fin lead her away from the back of the squad car and around to the passenger side, opening the door and Olivia sitting down as soon as he did, her legs out of the car. She leant forward and dropped her head between her knees, trying to steady her breathing while Fin kneeled beside her then reached over her to grab the bottle of unopened water from the cup holder and twisted the cap off before handing it to her. She swished some in her mouth and spit it out and again put her head down.

"Maybe you should sit this one out." He suggested

"No." she said, raising her head to look at him "I can't…"

"Liv…"

'Fin, you know the hell she's been through and you know what it took for us to get her out of it and help her recover after it."

"I know. You, me, El, Munch – we all busted our asses to help this girl"

"All for her to end up like this - killed by the very things she'd run away from? Fin, we have to make this right, we have to-"

"Baby girl, we'll get him." he promised "How's your stomach?"

"Better" she said and took a small sip from the water bottle.

"Good. Did you eat anything? You gotta keep up your strength for the baby" a look of shock registered on her face; since finding out a week ago, aside from Tricia, they hadn't told anyone.

"The… what?"

"Come on Liv, I watched you go through this twice, I know the drill" he grinned as she gave a telling smirk "How far along?"

"Six weeks"

"Not telling yet?" she shook her head

"Not for a few more weeks – though I'll probably have to disclose sooner to the brass. We should get back inside" she said, sighing as she stood.

"No, I'll get back inside"

"Fin, I can do my job"

"Of course you can, I just think you're too emotional right now."

"And I appreciate the concern but I'm fine. My emotions will not get in the way of catching this guy." She said just as her phone rang. "Benson" she answered "Yeah, I'm at the scene…okay, I'm on my way."

"Nick?" Fin asked

"Yeah, Jessica's mother is asking for me, I gotta get to the hospital. Go over this place with a fine tooth comb, make sure nothing is missed!"

"Don't worry."

"Call me the minute you have anything"

"Lieutenant. I got it."

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.

Olivia arrived at the hospital to find Nick waiting for her in the emergency room. The look on his face told her that the situation was worse than she thought.

"Nick, I'm sorry there was traffic, I got here as fast as I could." She apologized

"Liv"

"Was she able to tell you much?"

"Only asked for you but Liv…she didn't make it"

"Didn't make it?"

"Doctor said it was a massive heart attack; the shock of seeing her daughter… she died 20 minutes ago."

Olivia was numb as she sank into a chair, dropping her head into her hands as she let out an exasperated sigh.

"This day cannot get any worse!"

* * *

.

Early that evening back at the precinct, Olivia and the crew were going over evidence in the squad room when Melinda arrived.

"Tell us you got a hit" Olivia begged as she turned to greet her.

"We got a hit. The semen, the saliva found in the bite marks to her face and breasts and the blood and skin under her remaining fingernails are all from Paul Faust" Melinda told a shocked Olivia

"The husband?" Fin asked, not believing his own ears

"How is that even possible? He's still doing a 15 upstate for trying to kill her!" Olivia added

"Then you might wanna talk to the DOC, because unless that man can be in 2 places at once, he just finished what he started 10 years ago and the thing that worries me, he definitely wants us to know that it was him!"

Fin and Olivia looked at each other both unsure of how this could have happened and if Faust had been paroled, why hadn't anyone been notified?

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**Sorry if anyone had the impression that the identity of the killer would turn out to be some major character. Pretty much have all of the men in use for the purpose of the story so there would be no way to make that work. Plus, I think it works better to have an OC with where I plan to take this story; it gets worserer, lol! Anyway, I'd love to know what you think so please hit that beautiful review button. See y'all next chapter!**


	4. Serial

**THIS CHAPTER FOUGHT ME LIKE HELL BUT I FINALLY GOT SOMETHING I'M SATISIFIED WITH AN I HOPE YOU GUYS ARE TOO. WE PICK UP RIGHT WHERE THE LAST CHAPTER LEFT OFF. AS WARNED, THERE ARE DESCRIPTIONS OF VIOLENCE SO TREAD CAREFULLY. NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY, DICK WOLF OWNS THE SVU FOLKS, ALL OTHERS ARE MY OWN CREATION. ENJOY!**

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**Comment form chapter 3**

**Saradawn723 chapter 3 . Jul 24**

**I love this update. I'm intrigued. Very intrigued. A little fluff, which I like you know...and Fin/Liv friendship, which I adore...and of course you gotta top it off with some gore. Poor girl and poor liv. She better take care of herself. That baby needs to stay in it! Love this story already. Please update ASAP. Thank you. **

No, thank YOU! Well, here is that update, ASAP!

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**That evening at the sixteenth…**

"How the hell do you parole an inmate and fail to notify the person he tried to murder?" Olivia yelled into the phone.

"Lieutenant, we have tens of thousands of inmates currently in the correctional system, it's possible that inmates might slip through the cracks here and there"

""Might?" He's already killed his ex wife! She should have been at that parole hearing; my Sergeant and I should have been at that parole hearing!'

"And again, I apologize on behalf of the parole board but-"

"Save it!" she barked and slammed the receiver down onto its base and growled in frustration before she got up from her desk and walked out of her office and into the squad room.

"You don't look happy" Amanda said

"What gave it away?" Liv said sarcastically as she approached the conference table where her officers were gathered "Faust was paroled from Elmira a month ago"

"A month?! And they didn't think to notify Jessica…to notify us?" Nick asked.

"Slipped through the cracks" Olivia sneered as she took a seat at the table "but they are sorry" she mocked

"My ass!" Fin angrily exclaimed

"They apparently saw no problem when he failed to check in with his parole officer either! The system has failed this girl miserably!"

"Life failed this girl miserably!" everyone could see how upset Fin was "He abuses her, almost kills her, she loses her son to cancer when he's only seven and now… this is bullshit! Do we got any leads on Faust?"

"Homicide's got a manhunt goin but so far, nothin." Amanda said "it's almost like he's vanished just that fast."

"He got what he wanted" Nick chimed in "He's got no reason to stick around; probably in Canada as we speak."

"Wouldn't that just be the cherry on the fucking sundae?!" Olivia mused as she released a deep breath.

...

_He watched her as she got into her car and left the precinct that night… _

"_Idiots! They're so busy trying to find me and here is am, right under their pig noses!" he laughed to himself._

_She looked a lot different from the last time he'd seen her ten years ago – super thin with short-cropped hair. She was beautiful then, but now…wow! Long dark hair, curves for days; when it was her turn, he would enjoy beating and fucking her into submission before he dragged the blade of his knife across her throat and ripped it open but for now, he had to stay out of sight until me made his next move. _

"_One down, four to go!" he said as he started the car he'd stolen and drove away; he'd lay low for a while, while letting this cunt and her team think they'd have a chance of catching him._

...

* * *

_._

**Langan home…**

It was just before 10pm when Olivia arrived home with her mind racing from the day's events. After spending a few minutes with Semper and Jax who eagerly greeted her the moment she walked through the door, she headed upstairs, stopping first in Adrienne's room and was not surprised to find Caden curled up beside his sister, face-to-face with his thumb in his mouth just like when they were still in her womb; she and Trevor had given up on trying to make them sleep without each other - it didn't work when they were babies, doesn't work now and so at bedtime when one would crawl in with the other they just let it be, figuring that they'd be sick of each other soon enough so they might as well enjoy the peace while it lasted. She smiled as she leaned over them, adjusting the covers then kissing both their faces, lingering to take in their sweet scents before pulling back and taking Caden's thumb from his mouth.

After picking up the toys that were scattered across the floor and putting them in the toy chest, she kissed the twins again then made her way to Noah's room to see him sleeping peacefully in Trevor's arms who was himself fast asleep in the rocking chair. Noah's teething had been making it difficult for him to soothe himself to sleep lately and he needed the comfort of being held or he'd be up all night and very fussy.

She gently lifted him from Trevor's arms, rubbing soothing circles on his back when he began to stir and when he was sure that he was again sleeping, she gave him soft kisses before putting him down in his crib, staring down at him for a moment before she went back to the chair and leaned in to give her husband a sensual, lingering kiss on the lips. After a few seconds he pulled from his sleep and opened his eyes, smiling at the sight of his wife.

"There are laws against molesting sleeping persons" he said with a quiet grin on his face

"Hi." She smiled

"Hey" he said and pulled her in for another kiss. "how was work?"

"Shit. But I don't wanna talk about work right now"

"No?"

"No. In fact I don't wanna talk at all"

"Sleep?"

"That'll follow" she said and kissed him again before taking his hands and pulling him to his feet, leading him to their bedroom. Once inside, he looked down at her and put his hand to the back of her neck as he hungrily claimed her mouth and pulled off the band that held her hair, sending a cascade of dark waves tumbling around her face and shoulders then began to undo her pants with his free hand, and stripped her of them, her blouse and bra without tearing his mouth from hers.

Their lips parted for the first time, just long enough for her to grab the hem of his t shirt and pull it off over his head while he hovered over her as she lay on their bed in nothing but her panties. After she tossed his shirt, she pulled him back to her lips as she eagerly thrust her hips to meet his. She could feel his hard on and was desperate to have him inside her, needing him to fuck away the stress of everything. He reached between them, rubbing her clit through her panties - they were already soaked in anticipation and she began moaning into his mouth. When he moved his lips from hers and relocated them to her neck then her breast, drawing her nipple into his mouth as he pushed his fingers inside her she threw her head back and bit her lip to stifle the cry of pleasure that wanted to escape.

"Mm! Lock the door" she panted

"Baby, the kids are as-"

"Lock. The door." she repeated urgently, holding his head between her hands as she looked him in the eyes, speaking to him through her own. The last thing she wanted was for him to stop what he was doing but it had been two weeks; she needed this release and if anything were to interrupt them, she was certain that she would lose her mind! As much as she loved the life they'd carved out for themselves, with three kids and two careers, their sex life was suffering horribly, going from at least once a day to lucky-if-we-get-it-once-a-month. It was so infrequent, and so quick when it did happen, they were both amazed that he'd managed to get her pregnant again. He got the message and almost tripped hurrying to get to the door then made his way back to the bed and proceeded to ravage his wife. They frantically made love again and again, and she got the release she sought again and again, both of them trying to squeeze all of their pent up frustration into one night resulting in the most intense sex they'd had in a very, very long time and sending them both into a contented sleep.

* * *

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**One week later…**

An entire week later and there were still had no leads on the whereabouts of Paul Faust. They had gotten calls from all over the tri-state area – same even as far as Virginia, but every tip led to a dead end. Slowly, his trail was growing colder and it was starting to look like he just might get away with Jessica's murder

"How is it a fuckin week later and we got shit?" Fin yelled in frustration as he and the detectives again sat at the table going over what evidence they did have. He'd been here pretty much the entire week since Jessica's murder; eating, sleeping, showering here, having left only the times when he would have to respond to a call. He was determined that they would catch Faust, and with Liv going through another pregnancy and being drained lately, she couldn't put in the time that he could. He would work enough for both of them and he would make sure that the squad worked equally hard; they would not allow Jessica's death to be in vain.

"We got Becky Wallace's statement, Rollins is over at the courthouse getting Donnelly to sign the arrest warrant, this case is as good as closed!" Nick said upon entering the squad room.

"Good work Amaro" Fin praised his detective. "now how about we refocus and try to track down Faust?"

"Sergeant" One of the other squad detectives said urgently to Fin "we got a call"

* * *

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**Langan home…**

Olivia heaved violently into the toilet for the fifth time since she'd dropped to her knees just minutes ago. She was awakened by the smell of Tricia baking cinnamon buns down in the kitchen – she loved Tricia's cinnamon buns but this morning smelling them turned her stomach and she quickly threw Trevor's arms off of her and ran for the bathroom. Now she was sobbing as she hovered over the bowl and Trevor walked into the bathroom.

"I can't do this!" she cried, fighting to keep the next gush from erupting "I was n-never this sick with Chloe or the twins!" she quickly found that it was a losing battle and dropped her head as her stomach again convulsed, her throat burning from acid as she vomited again, making her cough. "What am I throwing up, there's nothing left!"

"I'm sorry baby" Trevor apologized as he offered a hand to help her to her feet then flushed the toilet and pulled her into his arms, kissing her forehead.

"If you have any hopes of ever touching me again after this baby is born, you're getting a vasectomy" she said as she sniffed back her tears

"Aww sweetie, we don't – wait, what?" he asked realizing what she said as she pulled away and went to the sink to rinse her mouth. "I'm going to assume that this is the vomit talking; I mean it is right? You don't really want me to…"

"I don't know what I want" she said after spitting the water into the sink" All I do know is that I'm sicker than I've ever been during pregnancy, I'm more exhausted than I've ever been- even when I was carrying the twins" she said as more tears slid down her face "I just want this over already!" she cried and walked out of the bathroom and into their bedroom.

"Honey, I thought you were happy about having another baby" he said as he followed her

"I am happy it's just…"

"What? Baby talk to me"

"Work, three kids in three years and now another baby; I just feel completely overwhelmed"

"Baby I get it"

"But you don't. You'll never understand from my point of view." Her nausea still hadn't abated and she was trying hard to keep from throwing up again.

"Then help me"

"We didn't plan for this to happen; getting pregnant again; I don't have enough time with the three we have - I thought that after Noah…"

"We'd be done" she didn't verbally respond, she simply nodded after a brief pause wiping her tears.

"And now here I am again, just when we got some balance back; morning sickness, mood swings… I can barely get out of bed in the morning and when I do, I have to tear myself away from the kids to go to a job that I'm not even sure I want anymore!" she was shocked that she'd actually, finally said it out loud and it caught him completely by surprise. He knew how much her job meant to her and couldn't believe that she was reconsidering it.

"Is that what this is about?"

"I don't know!" she cried "Us, the job, the kid, this goddamn case…and now a pregnancy!" She closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath through her nose, exhaling through her mouth while pressing her hand against her stomach.

"Maybe you should lie down"

"I'm fine" he paused and stared at her quizzically for a moment.

"Olivia, do you not want to have this baby?" he asked, it hurt him to even think it and he dreaded her answer even more, his eyes filling with tears as he waited for her reply.

"Trevor-" but before she could get another word out, Noah began to cry over the monitor.

"I'll get him" he said, dragging his hand down his face just as her phone rang.

"Yeah, I should get that, it's probably work" she said then walked across the room to grab her phone. "Yeah Fin?"

"We got a problem!"

* * *

.

**Cassidy home…**

"I want to be notified the very second there's a hit on the DNA, I won't be in the office today so you either reach me at home or on my cell." Alex said into the phone as she stood nursing she and Brian's 14 month old son Jacob. "And no one in the ME's office is to talk to the press, we clear? Good. Have Warner give me a call." She hung just as Brian came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her on the cheek.

"My beautiful wife doesn't sound very happy"

"Good morning babe" she said, turning her head to kiss his lips "I'm not very happy right now"

"He biting you again?" he asked and rubbed his son's thick mane of hair. "Jakey, Bruh!" he said jokingly to his youngest son who, just like his 3 older brothers was the spitting image of himself but unlike them, Jacob had inherited Alex' blue eyes. "Come on, you cannot damage the goods, those are loaners, man!"

"The toddler stopped sucking but didn't detach from his mothers breast as he smiled at his father. Brian gave a quick tickle to Jake's tummy, eliciting a hearty laugh from the boy who playfully swatted his father's hand away"

"No da dee, my ma ma" he smiled and again busied himself with his breakfast and Brian kissed his head.

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked Alex as he poured himself a cup of coffee and took a sip

"You're gonna be late"

"I'm the boss, I can do that" he grinned and took a seat at the island counter.

"The case last week, Jessica Morgan?" Alex reminded as she sat down beside him

"The one who's ex husband… "

"Yeah. Well, we got another rape/homicide this morning, same MO"

"And you think it's the same guy?"

"Sure looks like it; just like with Jessica, he left fluids in an on the body, I'm waiting on the DNA to come back." she sighed and ran a hand through her hair "With all the negative press already surrounding what the public perceives as NYPD's inability to do their job, a serial rapist/killer on the loose is the last thing we need!'

"So what happens next?" Brian asked

"If the DNA is Faust's, I have to call a strategy meeting with the commissioner and chief of detectives."

"I can't believe the system just let this guy slip through. This is gonna be a shit storm!"

"That's putting it mildly."

* * *

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**Saint Vincent's Hospital…**

"This baby is kickin ya ass, you look like death!" Fin said to Olivia who had just arrived at the crime scene and walked under the police tape that cordoned the end of the east wing of the fifth floor.

"I feel like death! Is Warner here yet?" she asked as she and Fin walked side by side down the corridor

"Just arrived ten minutes ago. You sure you can do this?"

"Unless there's cinnamon on the body, I'm fine"

"Huh?" Fin asked, confused

"Nothing" she said as they walked into the office suite of Dr. Angela Russo who now lay dead on top of her desk, her blood streaked legs dangling from the edge and the office in disarray.

"What the hell happened here?"

"What happened is it looks like Faust done struck again" Amanda said

"Dr. Angela Russo age 55, same MO" Nick added "Beaten, raped vaginally and anally, stabbed repeatedly and her throat slit" he said angrily as Olivia pulled back the sheet to get a look at the victim

"Right down to the bite marks on her face and breasts" Olivia noticed as her eyes scanned the body that was naked from the waist down. The doctor was still wearing her lab coat and her blouse, both which were soaked in blood. Her blouse was torn open to reveal the stab wounds to her chest along with a large, bloody number 2 that was carved deep into the woman's flesh, right between her breasts.

"The doctor didn't put up much of a fight" Melinda said "My guess is, she tried to cooperate, thinking he'd let her live"

"Fluids?" Olivia asked

"In and on her" Melinda answered "Her secretary says she saw her last at about 8pm last night, body temp confirms death ten to twelve hours ago"

"There's something about her…" Olivia said to herself, her brow furrowed as she tried to recall how she might know this doctor but nothing would come to her and she wondered if it was pregnancy brain making her forget as she turned around to face her detectives. "Nick, get me whatever info you can on Dr. Russo. Rollins, I want you to get the security footage from last night. Fin, what about the cleaning woman who found the body?"

"Already took her statement"

"Melinda, the DNA…"

"After Cabot, you'll be the second person I notify."

"Thanks" she said as she headed out of the office with Fin on her heels. Can you handle things here?" she asked him n a hushed tone as they walked the corridor

"You feelin okay?" he whispered as they again went under the police tape and into the waiting area

"Not so much" she was still battling her nausea and so far, it was winning.

"You need me to get you anything?"

"Thanks but I'll be fine."

"You go back to the office, put you head down; we'll see you in a bit"

"Always the big brother"

"Don't you forget it!" he smiled."By the way, congratulations"

"Thanks." Even though she was still unsure if this even was celebratory as she turned and left.

* * *

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**Sixteenth…**

Back at the precinct in Olivia's office, with the place practically empty and not much work to be done, she sat relaxing on the sofa, slowly sipping ginger ale while absently looking through a file; all the while replaying this morning in her head. She'd given Trevor the impression that she didn't want the baby and part of wondered if it wasn't true. She was so confused right now but she knew that she couldn't leave the issue in the air; they had to talk about it and tonight, they would she vowed to herself.

There was suddenly a knock at the door.

"Come in" she called. The door opened and Casey walked in.

"How's my favorite sister in law?" she asked as she kissed Olivia on the cheek

"Only sister in law" Olivia smiled as Casey sat in the chair beside the couch. "We haven't seen you and Travis since the twins' party 2 weeks ago"

"We've been a little busy planning our trip. We leave for Paris in three days; I am so enjoying being married to that man!"

"I can tell. I love that you're so happy."

"Love does wonders, even my health is better. Saw my doctor yesterday, my CD4 count is impressively high, viral load is astoundingly low, I'm the healthiest I've been in years!"

"Good because we are not ready to lose you anytime soon." Olivia smiled.

"Any leads in Jessica's case?"

"No unless you call no closer to catching that prick a lead. He disappears into thin air then resurfaces after a week to kill again and he got away; again!"

"This is starting to look like a serial, same MO I hear"

"How did you know about that?"

"Al, we talked this morning"

"Case, I keep feeling like I'm missing something. There is something about that woman that's familiar to me and I don't know what it is."

"That her?" Casey asked, referring to the picture in the file that was open on the table in front of them

"Yeah, Angela Russo" Olivia said as Casey picked up the picture

"Oh my god, it's Dr. Nicholson!"

"No, Russo" Olivia corrected

"No, Liv, this is Doctor Nicholson. She's older, grayer but I'm sure about this. When I prosecuted Faust ten years ago, do you remember he tried to plead insanity? This was the doctor who did his psych eval and determined that he was fit to stand trial."

"…she testified that she believed he was extremely dangerous and that he'd only escalate and needed to be put away…" Olivia said, suddenly remembering "Why would he have reason to come after her?"

"Maybe because her evaluation and testimony nailed his ass; because of her, he didn't skate on a psych plea"

"Revenge" Olivia said

"Looks like it"

"Case, if Faust is killing for revenge… I arrested him, you prosecuted him…"

"And Judge Donnelly locked his ass up" Casey finished "Liv you don't think…"

"I don't know, but we need to get this bastard before he has the chance!"

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**There you have it! Love it? Hate it? Either way, review and gimme feedback. Thanks for reading. **


	5. Protective Measures

**HELLO AGAIN! SO FOR THIS CHAPTER, I'M GOING TO BE BRINGING IN A FAMILIAR CHARACTER THAT WE ALL LOVE, BUT I'LL BE CHANGING HIS HISTORY JUST A BIT. THERE WAS NO PAST RELATION WITH ANY OF THE CHARACTERS SO HE HAS A CLEAN SLATE, NO OLD ANIMOSITIES TO CLOUD THE STORY. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE POSITIVE FEEDBACK, I'M GOING TO REVEL IN IT WHILE IT LASTS BECAUSE I'M PRETTY SURE YOU GUYS AREGONNA HATE ME IN A COUPLE MORE CHAPTERS AND I DO APOLOGOZE IN ADVANCE FOR THE INHUMANITY OF MY ACTIONS. DICK WOLF IS LORD OF ALL AND OWNS ANY SVU CHARACTERS IN USE HERE; ALL OTHERS CHARACTRS ARE MINE. PICKING UP WHERE WE LEFT OFF, ENJOY!**

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**Reader comment from chapter 4**

**Scyndrrella chapter 4 . Jul 28**

**Oh the suspense, the suspense! I really love the pace of this story. You are intermingling their personal lives and work so beautifully! **  
**My only fear is that Casey may end up next, and I don't think my heart could take it. She has finally found happiness despite her illness. **  
**Anxiously awaiting the next installment!**

Don't fret, the next installment is here.

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**.**

**Olivia's office…**

"Yes of course, please have her contact me as soon as she can…thank you." Olivia said into the phone before she hung up. She'd attempted to contact Elizabeth Donnelly to discuss Paul Faust.

"Well?" Casey wondered.

"She's out of the country – vacationing in Italy until September."

"Well, if Faust does have her in his sights then that leaves her safe for a few weeks" Casey reasoned, "Broke ex con with no passport…"

"…airports on alert; there's no way he's leaving the country. But where does that leave us?" Olivia asked

"Maybe we're getting ahead of ourselves"

"Meaning?"

"Meaning, we don't actually know that there's anything to be worried about" Casey said, trying to sound surer than she felt.

"You wanna take that chance?" Olivia asked "because I sure as hell don't, I have four babies to think about"

"No, of course not, but why freak ourselves out over what we don – _four _babies?"

"I meant three"

"But you said four"

"But I meant three"

"Don't bullshit me Benson!" Casey chided, Olivia went silent "Oh my god…are you…you're pregnant?"

"Shhhhh!" there were still a few officers hanging around the squad room and the last thing she wanted was for them to overhear before she was ready to announce.

"Holy shit!" Casey exclaimed, this time much quieter "Why didn't you tell me?"

"We haven't told anyone except Tricia…and Fin, they both figured it out; we wanted to wait until I passed my first trimester before we told everyone."

"How far along are you?"

"Seven weeks"

"Is everything okay? How've you been feeling?"

"Uh, so sick I wanna eat my gun most mornings but the doctor says everything looks good so far."

"They say the sicker you are, the healthier the baby so that's a plus"

"Plus?" Olivia laughed "Kinda hard seeing that silver lining when you're on your knees every morning and most nights, literally sobbing while your head's in the toilet but, I guess…"

"In a few weeks you'll be past it and enjoying your pregnancy." Casey smiled. "Trevor must be ecstatic!"

"He was"

"Was? What…"

"He thinks that I don't want the baby"

"What gave him that idea? I mean, is he right for assuming…?

"No, he couldn't be more wrong! We sort of had a fight this morning… I made the mistake of telling him that I feel overwhelmed, that I don't know how we're gonna handle another baby and that I thought we'd be done after Noah."

"Oh, honey" Casey sympathized.

"Then he asked me flat out if I wanted the baby and I froze but before I could answer, Noah's cries came over the monitor and Fin called about Dr. Russo… Case, the look in his eyes…" Olivia put her hand to her stomach and exhaled slowly

"Queasy?"

"Yeah. Are we really sitting here casually conversing about my pregnancy when this mess with Faust is happening?"

"Look at it like this, not discussing your pregnancy won't make all this shit un-happen…besides having something so good and pure to focus on will make having to deal with this investigation a lot easier" she said as she rubbed Olivia's stomach.

"If only it were that easy"

"I know"

"I don't think you do…Case, I'm tired; I have been for a long time now"

"Of what…the job?"

"I don't have the same passion for it anymore and Jessica's murder made me see just how burned out I really am. I think after this mess with Faust is over; no, I know – I'm gonna be putting my papers in." Casey sat, dumbfounded for a moment

"Wow! That's…wow!"

"I haven't talked to Trevor about it yet so…"

"No worries" Casey promised

"We better call Al and Commissioner Reagan, they need to be on top of this…whatever it is."

...

_Even he didn't understand why he'd done it as he sat in the corner of the dilapidated building where he was hiding out, sniffing the panties of the doctor he'd killed. Why had he even bothered taking them? He wondered. Whatever the reason he'd stuffed them in his pocket as he was on his way out of her office last night, he was suddenly drawn to her scent and smiled fiendishly as he inhaled again, deeper this time before stuffing them back into his pocket, remembering how the doctor begged for her pathetic life, hw she screamed beneath his hand while he took her._

"_Nice and tight for an old cunt!" he mused "I can't wait to my hands on the rest, and a knife in them" he grinned._

"_In time Paulie, in time. But for now we lay low, let it breathe… 2 down, three to go!" he said and drained the last of his beer from its bottle before throwing it across the room where it smashed against a wall._

_..._

**Later that afternoon…**

"We have patrol at every bridge and tunnel in and out if the city" Olivia informed the squad as she sat at the head of the conference table

"…as well as the other four boroughs." Fin added. "Faust is considered extremely dangerous so use all necessary precaution wh -"

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Lieutenant Benson" the man with the scruffy beard said as he entered the squad room.

"I'm lieutenant Benson" Olivia said as she turned around in her chair to look at the man "And you are?"

"Lieutenant Declan Murphy" he answered, extending his hand

"How can I help you lieutenant?" Olivia asked as she shook it

"Actually, I'm here to help you. I'm going to be taking over the Faust case."

"Excuse me?"

"Commissioner Reagan –"

"I just met with The Commissioner and the DA a few hours ago"

"And he took what you said to him very seriously; as of now you are off this case!"

"What's he talkin about Lieutenant?" Fin asked Olivia

"We have every reason to believe that there is a pattern to these killings" Murphy answered before Olivia could even open her mouth.

"What kind of pattern?" Nick inquired. Murphy started to speak again but Olivia put up her finger, quickly silencing him

"It's just a theory right now" she said

"…a theory that puts yourself, CADA Novak and Judge Donnelly as Faust's potential victims!" Murphy interrupted, putting the whole squad in a panic

"What the hell?" Fin exclaimed

"After realizing who Dr. Russo was, Casey and I began wondering what if Faust going after the women who had a hand in locking him up" Olivia explained "…the wife who accused him, the doctor who made sure he stood trial…"

"…you for arresting him, Novak for prosecuting him…" Fin continued, catching on

"And let me Guess" Amanda interjected "Donnelly was the judge who handed down the sentence?"

"Gave him the max, 15 years. He got out in 10 – good behavior" Olivia said as she got up from her chair and headed to her office with Fin and Murphy following

"The point is, if you are a potential target, the Commissioner doesn't want you anywhere near this case, the safety of his officers is paramount to all else and until we catch this bastard, you're on paid leave!" Murphy informed Olivia, handing her an envelope as they stepped inside her office.

"What's this?" She asked, shutting the door

"The official order from Commissioner Reagan…he'll also be assigning protective detail 24/7"

"I don't need protective detail" she protested. Fin gave her a disapproving look. "Lieutenant Murphy, I need a word with my sergeant, do you mind?" she asked

"Not at all, I'll be outside getting acquainted with the squad; I'm sorry we had to meet under such circumstances."

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**Liv is out, what now? And how are you guys liking that I brought Murphy in? I promise, much longer chapter next time but in the meantime, how about some reviews to let me know how I'm doing?**


	6. The Way We Were

**I PROMISED LONGER CHAPTERS WERE COMING AND I HAVE DELIVERED! ALSO, YOU GUYS ASKED FOR MORE FLUFF, HERE'S YOUR DAMN FLUFF FROM ALL THREE COUPLES, GOTTA WARN YOU THOUGH, WE WON'T BE SEEING MUCH OF THE FLUFFY STUFF STARTING NEXT CHAPTER; THINGS START MOVING AND THEY DO NOT SLOW DOWN FOR QUITE SOME TIME. NOW THAT'S NOT TO SAY THAT THERE WON'T BE ENDEARING MOMENTS DURING ALL THIS MOVEMENT BUT… WELL I THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO GIVE YOU GUYS FOND MEMEMORIES TO HOLD ON TO SO WHEN TIMES GET ROUGH, I WANT YOU ALL TO REMEMBER WHO MADE YOU SMILE BUT LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW, K? K! WE PICK UP WHERE WE LEFT OFF LAST CHAPTER – BY THE WAY, I'M SO HAPPY THAT YOU GUYS LIKED THE ADDITION OF MURPHY TO THE MIX. ANYWAY, DICK WOLF OWNS WHAT'S HIS, I OWN WHAT'S MINE WHICH EQUATES TO ABOUT $3.00 AND A HAM SANDWICH, LOL. ENJOY AND THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS, YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!**

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**Reader comment from chapter 5**

**Bobbie23 chapter 5 . Aug 4**

**I'm so happy you brought Murphy in, for the few episodes I saw him in I adored him. I thought Casey's reaction to the pregnancy was fantastic "Holy shit." You portrayed their friendship really well. I don't think being out of the investigation will stand in Liv's way of helping out, wonder what she and Fin are talking about. Looking forward to the next chapter.**

Lol, you know our Liv!

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**.**

**Olivia's office…**

"Okay, you wanna tell me what that look was about?" Olivia asked Fin as soon as Murphy left her office.

"You're takin the detail"

"Like hell I am!"

"You were smart enough to figure out Faust's plan, be smart enough to let NYPD protect you until the threat is over"

"Fin, you know Faust, he's a coward! Why do you think he's only going after the _women_ who had a hand in putting him away?"

"That doesn't change the fact that he might still come after you, or Casey!"

"Only if he thinks we're alone. Casey's leaving for Paris in three days and now that I've been relieved of my duties indefinitely…" her annoyance that Commissioner Reagan had made the decision without including her was quite obvious

"You'll be home with the kids – alone"

"He's not interested in the kids and I can protect myself" she protested

"And 2 months ago I wouldn't have argued" Olivia shot him a disbelieving look

"Okay I would have argued a little but it's different now, you're pregnant"

"Yes, pregnant, not dead"

"Liv who you kiddin? This kid's been kickin ya ass hard; you been nothing but sick and exhausted for weeks."

"Fin…"

"Olivia, take the detail." Olivia gave a heavy sigh "look, it's either that or I will personally follow you around my damn self and I'm sure Trevor, Nick and Brian wouldn't mind helping me out"

"Are you seriously threatening to tell?" she said with an amused grin on her face "what are we, 5?"

"Whatever keeps you safe" he grinned in return

"Fine, if it'll put your mind at ease, I'll have Trevor take some time off from the firm, problem solved"

"You sure about that?"

"Faust won't come within a mile of me if Trevor's around, we both know it!"

"I know, I just worry about you"

"And I appreciate you for it but now that the threat's been recognized I know to be careful and I promise, I will be. But in the mean time, I need a favor"

"Anything"

"Keep me in the loop? I can't just sit back and watch this investigation happen"

"Liv…"

"Fin please; I need to help in any way I can, I have to see this through"

"I could get in get in a shitload of trouble for this Benson"

"We both could, but it's for Jessica."

There was a long and awkward silence as the two of them looked at each other, trying to read each other's thoughts. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, it was Fin who spoke"

"I'll stop by when I can; get you updated on the investigation – on one condition" he said as he got up from where he sat beside her on her – now Murphy's desk.

"Being?"

"You don't fight Reagan on protective detail"

"Fin!"

"Whatever!" he said as he moved toward the door , his hands raised in mock surrender "Emotionally blackmail Nick…see if Rollins can help you out… of course, they can't get the intel I can and since we both know that this whole paid leave probably came from Cabot's lips to Reagan's ears, she won't be talkin"

"Fine!" Olivia relented, deciding that the case was more important than her stubbornness.

"That's what I wanna hear." He smiled. "come on, I'll follow you home"

"Thanks, gimme a second ok? Tell the new guy I'll be right out."

"You okay with this?"

"Do I really have a choice?"

Fin left the office, shutting the door behind him as Olivia sharply exhaled. How was she going to explain this mess to Trevor? She wondered as she reached behind her and picked up the desk phone.

...

**Trevor's office…**

"Everything ok?" he asked as soon as he picked up

"Depends on how you define "okay""

"The baby?"

"The baby's fine, the kids are all fine"

"But you don't sound fine"

"It's um…something's happened at work that you need to know about"

"Are you alright?"

"I am. I just…well it's a long story. Anyway, Casey and Travis volunteered to watch the kids tonight so I'm gonna stay at the apartment; I'm on my way there and…"

"So early? It's barely 4"

"That's part of the story."

"You sure you're ok?" he asked again

"I promise… I'll see you tonight?"

"I'll finish up here and be there as soon as I can."

"Trevor?"

"Yeah?" Olivia stopped, heavily contemplating her next words but quickly decided that they could wait and allowed them to die on her lips.

"Nothing. I'll see you in a bit." She said and hung up before another word could be said between them.

...

She knew when she left for work this morning that she and Trevor would have to talk when she got home tonight and was secretly hoping that work would keep her late enough so that she could get delay the inevitable but now there was no avoiding it. She thought back again to this morning and again remembered the hurt on his face.

"Would he even believe me now?" she wondered out loud "One stupid pause!" she put her hand to her stomach, looking down at it "Are you already becoming a bump?" she mused, noticing the slight bloat "You're only 7 weeks old, slow down in there!" she smiled. "You know, you were a big surprise for daddy and me; especially for me… BIG surprise! But I promise you little one, I do want you and I love you so much and I can't wait until you're here… just do mama a favor and come alone okay? Oh, and if you could maybe ease up so I'm not so sick, that'd be great!

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

"Aunt Casey, look!" Adrienne called from the pool where she frolicked with Caden and Travis. Casey looked over at her niece in time to see the little girl pinch her nose and disappear under the water, quickly coming back up with a huge smile on her face.

"Ta daaaaa!" she said, proud of her new trick.

"That was amazing Drew!" Casey cheered from where she sat on the pools edge, carefully holding Noah while he splashed his chubby arms and legs in the water.

"I love how relaxed you are" Travis said to his wife

"I could totally get used to this" she smiled. She hadn't yet told Travis about the possible threat, deciding that she didn't want to ruin the day they'd been having with something so sick. besides, she didn't consider it much of a threat so why worry her husband over what might be nothing?

"Lazy days by the pool? Tell me about it" Travis responded as he lifted Jamie, then Drew out of the water and onto the ground. They went running through the back yard as soon as their feet hit the grass.

"That too" Casey smiled, "but I meant the kids" she finished as Travis made his way over to her

"I agree, we should definitely spend more time with the rugrats!" he said before kissing her

"Up!" Noah smiled and reached for Travis

"I got ya dude!" Travis grinned as he took Noah from Casey's arms and tossed him high into the air while Noah giggled happily and Casey cringed. Travis caught the toddler who was now laughing hysterically and clapping his hands

"You're gonna drop him!" Casey yelled as she reached for Noah

"I won't drop him! Besides, we're in water and he likes it" Travis laughed as he turned away from her

"Want up!" Noah demanded as he threw his arms in the air and Casey shot Travis an _I dare you _look.

"Sorry bud, Aunt Casey says no up" Travis explained to him with a mock sad face

"Aw man!" Noah exclaimed and sighed, slapping his hand against his forhead

"Dude, I know, buzzkill"

"Mama up no!" he continued

"Mama says no too? How do you live this way?" Travis joked, Noah looked at his uncle and quickly shrugged his shoulders, sending Casey and Travis into a fit of laughter.

* * *

.

**Cassidy home…**

Brian was in the living room wrestling with his boys when Alex walked through the front door and dropped her purse and briefcase in the foyer, deciding to follow the noise.

"I'm ho…" she was stopped in her tracks, shocked at the enormity of the mess in the living room. "God I need my daughter!" she sighed. Winnie had one more week at camp and Alex couldn't wait to have her home, she loved her boys with all her heart but she missed her little girl and all the mother-daughter time.

"Hey babe" Brian called

"Hi mommy!" the twins shouted in unison and went about playing with their father

"Hey babies" she said as she took a seat on the sofa and kicked off her shoes

"Hey mommy, love you!" Zach yelled, holding Brian in a headlock.

"Love you more!" she answered. It was only Jake who got up to go to his mother, his little feet toddling along.

"Mama" he called, smiling with his arms outstretched. Alex got up to meet him half way, eagerly scooping him up into her arms and squeezing him tight while plying him with kisses.

"Did you miss me?" she asked as she reclaimed her seat on the sofa

"Miss you" he said giving her a wet kiss before he sat down on her lap.

"How was your day off?" Brian joked

"Very funny! I got called in to a meeting with Liv and Commissioner Reagan…"

"Faust?"

"Of course"

"Mama…milk?" Jake asked sleepily. Without missing a beat, Alex undid her blouse as she continued talking to Brian, quickly getting Jake latched on while recounting the details of her meeting.

"…and if that wasn't enough, there's a possibility that this psycho may be coming after Liv and Casey"

"What?!"

"The victim turns out to be the doctor who ruled Faust competent to stand trial and testified against him. it looks like he's going after the women who were involved with sending him to prison"

"You gotta be shittin me!" Brian said as he got up and joined his wife and youngest son on the couch while Connor, Liam and Isaac continued roughhousing on the floor.

"It's just a theory right now" she said as she looked down at Jake and stroked his hair. His little eyelids were getting heavy as he fed and she knew that he'd soon be asleep for the night. "We won't know until he makes his next move – if there is a next move… and the day wouldn't have been complete without the press getting a leak and bombarding my office and 1PP for a statement; they're already trying to label this a serial"

"You really think Liv and Casey could be in danger?"

"And Liz"

"Donnelly?" Brian asked

"She sentenced him…"

"Tangled fucking web!"

"Reagan took Liv off the case, put her on administrative leave until Faust is in custody and ordered 24 hour protective detail"

"Smart move"

"Tell that to Liv, she's not happy! She wanted to be the one to put him away again"

"No, Reagan did the right thing; once she's had the chance to calm down, she'll see it and let it go"

"Brian, you really believe that?"

"Nah, but it's nice to think it though!" he grinned and leaned in to plant a quick kiss on his wife's lips.

"My mama da dee!" Jake said crankily as he pushed Brian away then went back to feeding.

"Kid, you are askin for it!" Brian laughed.

* * *

.

**Langan apartment…**

Trevor arrived to the apartment just after six and though Olivia's plan had been to tell him all about what had happened with work, seeing his demeanor made her decide to postpone it until after dinner but she wondered if they would talk at all. He hadn't planned on feeling such an overwhelming sense of anger toward his wife but the minute he looked at her, he was taken back to this morning and what she said – and didn't say and suddenly, there it was. They'd shared a brief and awkward kiss when he came through the door and exchanged a few words that mainly consisted of him coolly asking if she was feeling alright.

"I'm fine" she assured him, reaching out to touch his face but he quickly moved past her and toward the living room leaving her feeling dejected but she pushed the hurt down and followed him. For a moment he just ignored her presence in the room as she stood there in the entryway, her arms folded across her chest as she leaned against the arch, but when he could feel her eyes tearing into him as he poured himself a drink, he spoke to ease the tension.

"What was it you needed to tell me?" he asked without looking at her

"I...it can wait"

"But you said…"

"I know what I said; let's just…later, okay? You don't seem to be in a very talkative mood right now." He sighed and turned to look at her.

"I'm not, not really"

"I get that" she said in a near whisper, fighting the tears that were stinging her eyes "Dinner's ready, why don't you go wash up" she said and headed off to the kitchen. He was still visibly upset about this morning and she had no idea how to broach the subject to try to fix it but one thing she knew for sure, him being distant wasn't helping matters and it resonated throughout dinner.

...

They ate at the large dining room table with an even louder silence between them until Olivia couldn't take it anymore.

"This is ridiculous!" she said and threw her napkin down onto her plate then stood up, picking up her plate and taking Trevor's even though he hadn't finished eating and walked out leaving Trevor sitting there alone. He hung his head in his hands and let out a deep sigh.

Olivia got to the kitchen and threw the dishes into the sink, stopping to take a few deep breaths to calm herself while she gripped the sides of countertop with both hands. She knew that he was upset this morning but this...

"I was still eating" Trevor said and she turned around to see him standing in the kitchen doorway

"Are you serious?" she asked incredulously "Help yourself, I made plenty!" she seethed and stormed out of the kitchen. He quickly turned and followed her.

"What did you expect Olivia, that I would come in here all sunshine and roses and just pretend like this morning didn't happen? Just ignore the fact that you don't want our baby?" his words stopped her in her tracks as she turned to face him.

"I never said I didn't want the baby!"

"Oh that's right; you said nothing!"

"I paused!" she yelled "That was not an admission!"

"Maybe there was a reason for pausing"

"You're right – it was because you threw me off by asking such a completely asinine question! Of course I want this baby" she said then stepped closer, taking his head in her hands and looking him square in the eye, her voice softening with her next words "How could I not? This baby is us; what did you think I would do?"

"You want me to answer that honestly?" he asked, his tone dripping with derision

"Always"

"I've been going crazy all day wondering if you weren't thinking about terminating" his words hit hard and she was so taken aback that she had to swallow the tears that were suddenly threatening to choke her as her hands dropped from his face and she stepped away from him. The very second he saw her reaction, he felt like a complete ass because there was now no doubt in his mind that his assumptions had been wrong.

"How could you think that?" she asked in a shaky whisper, her hurt evident

"I'm sorry, I-"

"No, I wanted your truth I, I just… that?" she couldn't hold back her tears and let them roll freely down her face.

"I didn't mean-" he felt like crawling into a hole, wishing to god that he could take back his words.

"Are you forgetting that I went through an entire pregnancy that ended in the loss of my baby girl? Our first child! That my body carried her for nine months and then three weeks before she was supposed to come into the world, I lost her to some stupid accident that I still can't even remember happening?"

Those words immediately sent his mind back to the day he found Mairym's letter and that video of Elliot confessing that he'd… he quickly shook the memory from his head.

"Liv…"

"Five years later and I still live with that pain every day of my life; I still have nightmares about waking up in that hospital and having you tell me that she was gone and you really think that I could even consider purposely taking our baby away from us?"

"You just seemed so upset -"

"Because I am! I never tried to hide the fact that I'm feeling completely overwhelmed right now but it doesn't mean that I'll feel this way forever and I swear, it doesn't detract the love that I already feel for this child; the love I felt from the minute I began thinking I might be pregnant."

"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I never meant to imply that I believed you would; I just wondered if…"

"Whatever reservations I may have about whether or not we can handle another, I do want this baby – there has never been a doubt in my mind about that; he or she already means the world to me"

He was silent as he let his fingers skim over the small expanse of skin of her stomach that peeked out from the flowing silk chemise that she wore, tears falling as he pulled her into his arms, wrapping her in his embrace.

"I'm such an ass!" he whispered and held her tighter, kissing the top of her head while his tears continued to fall "Please forgive me!"

"I'm already there" she said, letting the sound of his beating heart soothe her, a sound that was interrupted when her phone began ringing. She sighed and wiped her eyes before going t retrieve it from the coffee table, a smile curling on her lips when she saw that it was a video call from Casey.

"Hey Honey" she said as she connected the video chat, and took a seat on the sofa, Trevor coming over to join her

"Everything okay?" Casey asked, "How'd it go?"

"Hey Case" Trevor said

"Hey big brother!" she smiled "Sooooo?"

"We're okay." Olivia said

"You told her?" Trevor asked Olivia

"Sorry, it slipped" she apologized, he let out a loud sigh of relief

"What's that about? She asked

"I told Brian and Travis two weeks ago" he confessed sheepishly

"You what?!" Liv and Casey both said

"I was excited and they promised not to tell"

"Kept their word on that…" Casey said, rolling her eyes at Travis who entered the bathroom with a sleeping Noah on his shoulder.

"What did I do?" Travis asked off camera

"How could you not tell me about the baby?"

"Trev said not to." He shrugged simply "You talkin to them? Sup bro!" he called from off camera"

"Hey!" Trevor called back as Casey gave a 'Hmph!' all while Olivia shook her head and laughed

"Where are the kids?" she asked

"Noah's asleep but uncle secrets over there refuses to put him down" she said and turned the camera to Travis who waved at Liv and Trevor then waved Noah's limp hand "and the twins are having their bath she continued as he turned the phone so that Olivia and Trevor could see Jamie and Drew in the bathtub, both heir little heads piled high with suds. Olivia genuinely smiled for the first time since this morning. "Say hi to mommy guys"

"Hi mommy!" they screamed gleefully in unison "we miss you!"

"I miss you too, munchkins'

"Daddy, do we have to go to sleep?"Jamie asked

"What did Aunt Casey say?"

"She says we have to" Drew answered

"Then you have to"

"Awwww!" the twins groaned, Olivia laughed.

"None of that, okay? And I want you to behave yourselves for ant Casey and Uncle Travis"

"Okay…love you mommy, love you daddy!" they waved

"We love you too, very, very much. We'll see you guys tomorrow" Trevor said

"Goodnight" they said waving and blowing kisses before Travis and Casey came back on the screen.

"Don't worry sis, they'll be fine" Travis assured her

"I know they're in good hands; kiss them for me?" she asked, growing more emotional as she looked at her sleeping baby boy and heard the twins' laughter in the background

"Babe, don't cry" Casey said, feeling her own emotions welling up"

"I'm okay, hormones…" Olivia said as Trevor put his arm around her

"We'll kiss them until their faces hurt" Travis promised

"Dork!" Casey chided

"You love this dork!" Travis grinned making his wife smile as she pulled him in for a kiss.

'Hanging up now" Trevor said as he heard his twins in the background

"_Ewwwww!"_

Olivia couldn't help but smile at her perfect little family as Trevor kissed her head then took her hands in his

"I love you…more than anything and I just need to know that we're ok."

"I love you too, you know that…but you're not getting off that easily"

"Okay, what do I need to do?" he asked. "…whatever it takes"

"Well for starters…" she said and rose up on her knees, leaning in to him and running the tip of her tongue across his lips then kissed him; catching his bottom lip between her teeth and gently sucking on it "Get your pretty ass in the bedroom!" she grinned

He was more than happy to comply and quickly scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder, carrying her that way to the bedroom while she laughed.

...

They made love repeatedly for the next few hours, him taking the time to savor and explore every inch of her body as if it were new to him and she, crumbling with every touch and driven to tears with how exquisitely he took her – never failing to amaze her with how new and exciting their lovemaking always seemed even after 5 years. Especially when she lay beneath him like this, orgasm after orgasm wracking her body as she clawed desperately at his skin while wrapping her body around his and as they came down from their respective highs, together. She couldn't imagine that there would ever come a time when they wouldn't be like this and he wouldn't be the very center of her world.

...

**Langan home…**

Later that night, Travis and Casey lay in bed after making love, she contentedly in his arms.

"I can see why Liv and Trevor love it here so much, it's so serene" Casey said lazily as she pulled her husband's arms tighter around her.

"Yeah, I could definitely get used to this"

"Speaking of getting used to… I wasn't talking about seeing our niece and nephews more often – of course I love spending time with them but I meant our kids; Travis, I think I'm ready." She said as she propped herself up on her elbow.

"Doll, please tell me that you really mean this because I am BEYOND ready to do this!"

"I was scared but I'm doing so good now, I mean you heard what the doctor said if I continue doing well with my medication there's no reason that we have a long happy life together and I know how much being a father means to you; I don't wanna deny you that anymore. We can start the adoption process as soon as we get back from Paris.

"Case…" he smiled tearfully

"Travis I love you! So utterly, so completely and I don't care what the doctors say about medicine, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that your love is the reason I'm still here. You gave me a reason to smile when all I wanted to do was cry and you showed me the beauty in life when I couldn't see it anymore…"

"You _are_ the beauty in life and I love you beyond everything!" He said before he pulled her in for kiss as he tangled his hands in her gorgeous mane of red hair.

* * *

.

**Precinct…**

Over at the sixteenth it was past midnight and Fin was still there going over the evidence and footage from the hospital security cameras; there was Faust, plain as day, leaving the hospital after murdering doctor Russo, turning to the camera and waving. Fin couldn't get over it.

"Sergeant, maybe it would serve you better to go over it with fresh eyes tomorrow." Murphy said as he emerged from Olivia's office prepared to leave for the night. "When's the last time you slept?"

"I'm good. I'll rest when we catch Faust and in the mean time, this bastard's laughing at us!" He was becoming more incensed each time he played it back, there had to be something there that would give him a clue as to where Faust might be headed.

"If he's smart he'll change his pattern"

"Trust, Faust is a dumb muthafucka! He'll slip up and when he does…"

"Don't over-think it, you'll end up missing more than you find." Murphy advised. "See you in the morning" he said as he left the squad room.

Fin continued pouring over the evidence and after a few minutes had gone by, one of the unis entered the squad room holding a brown envelope.

"Sergeant" The young man called to Fin

"What is it?" Fin asked without turning around

"Sir, I have a package"

"Put it on my desk"

Like every single one of the rookies at the 1-6, Officer Brown was scared to death of Fin and did not take pleasure in having to talk with and risk getting on the older man's nerves.

"Sir…I think you might want to look at it now, it was left outside and it's addressed to Lieutenant Benson…from her friend Paul" the young officer said nervously but he got Fin's attention.

"Good job Rookie!" Fin said as he turned around and took the envelope, proud to see that the young officer had taken measures to not contaminate the envelope and had used a handkerchief to pick it up. "very good job!" Fin smiled

"Thank you, sir!" Officer Brown replied; proud that he had pleased his superior.

Fin looked down at the envelope and sure enough, the writing said exactly what Officer brown told him it did

_To detective Benson from your friend Paul._

"This son of a bitch!" Fin exclaimed.

Moments later, after getting on a pair of gloves, fin sat down to open the envelope. Inside there was a handheld digital recorder with a note secured to it by a rubber band. Fin detached the note and unfolded it to read.

_So you know what to expect when it's your turn._

_-PF_

Fin was shocked to his core when he pressed play and discovered that what he held in his hands wasn't just a threat, it was audio of the rape and murders of both Jessica Morgan and Dr. Angela Russo!

...

_Once night had fallen, Faust had been freer to move about the city with the darkness there to protect him and he walked right up the the 16th precinct and left a little package that he knew Olivia and her colleagues would love!_

_He'd moved on to his next stop, the place he'd be staying until he was ready for his next act of vengeance, ready to show yet another of these worthless whores who held the real power. They would never catch him even if they did figure out his pattern, he'd be long gone and on to the next before the body was even cold. _

"_The best way to hide is in plain sight!" he grinned, thinking how stupid the NYPD was_

_Soon he'd have them all..._

"_But who should be next?" he asked himself as he stared at their pictures on his wall; the same pictures he'd kept in his cell at Elmira all these years. He thought back to that place and he shuddered. During his time there those bastards treated him like he was the bitch; fucked him six ways to Sunday and it only got worse when they'd found out why he was there._

"_Fucking useless cunts! It was their fault, all of this was their fault!" He picked up his knife and angrily threw it at the wall the tip of the blade landing like a dart and embedding itself, straight through one of the pictures. When Faust noticed, a smile spread across his face as if he'd just experienced a divine revelation and he got up from the old bed and went to the wall, pulling the knife out and taking down the picture it had pierced._

"_Well I'll be damned!" he grinned, please with the choice that had been made for him. "The knife has spoken…I guess you're next!" he said to the photo of the woman in his hand._

* * *

_._

**I apologize for the inhumanity of the actions that will begin occurring… remember, I gave y'all fluff!**


	7. Diversion

**BEFORE I SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS CHAPTER, JUST WANT TO WARN THAT IT CONTAINS VIOLENCE, RAPE AND MURDER SO READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION. NOW WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY, I WARNED YOU GUYS THAT THINGS WOULD GET ROUGH STARTING WITH THIS CHAPTER SO FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO CHOSE TO CONTIN UE AFTER THE LAST CHAPTER, PLEASE DON'T SCREAM AT ME…WELL, IF YOU REALLY NEED TO THEN I GUESS IT'S OK. THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR THE REVIEWS, THEY REALLY HELP KEEP THE CREATIVE JUICES FLOWING. GOTTA GIVE PROPS TO THE DICK…WOLF I MEAN. HE OWNS IT ALL AND WITHOUT HIM – WELL I'D PROBABLY BE SANE AND PRODUCTIVE BUT THAT'S ANOTHER DISCUSSION, ENJOY!**

* * *

**Reader comment chapter 6**

**LaceNLeather24 chapter 6 . Aug 12**

**Alright now that's is what I am talking about! A damn good chapter this is. So I wonder who the knife landed on... I'm not putting my money on Liv but somebody who is very close to her. So yes I loved the fluff between each couple, especially Casey and Travis this time. Can't wait until the next chapter with all the drama and angst. Please don't take too long, my little heart won't be able to take it. ;)**

Well, here is the drama and angst you wanted...I apologize.

* * *

.

**Langan apartment…**

While Olivia lay in his arms that night, her naked body thrown haphazardly around his as she slept, Trevor couldn't close his eyes. Over and over his mind replayed the fight they'd had earlier and one part in particular gnawed at him, making him question for the first time in years if he had in fact made the right decision.

"_I lost her to some stupid accident that I still can't even remember happening…_ _I still have nightmares about waking up in that hospital and having you tell me that she was gone…"_

As he looked down at his sleeping wife, He couldn't help thinking how peaceful she looked and wondered just how she would react if she knew. _Don't be stupid Trevor, it's been too long! _He thought before kissing the top of her head and slipping out of bed, being careful not to wake her then after sliding his robe on to cover his nakedness, he made his way out of the bedroom and down the hall into the cavernous living room where he stood for a long time just staring out of the floor-to-ceiling windows, watching as the summer rain drenched the city in a steady downpour and wishing that it could wash away the sudden feelings of anxiety that now plagued him.

He thought he had been protecting her by keeping the truth about Chloe's death hidden from her, he was sure that it would be too much for her to handle – to know that someone had intentionally set out to harm their child, and not just any someone but the very man she'd once loved and trusted.

Elliot Stabler. _It's been a long time since that name crossed my mind _he thought and just as quickly his anxiety was replaced by rage! He remembered reading Mairym's letter, seeing that video just as vividly as if they were right in front of him. He remembered the sheer devastation he felt, how sickened, how weak and utterly useless he felt at discovering what Elliot had done, it was like he was in that waiting room all over again while the doctors tried to save his wife and daughter. There was nothing he could do to help either of them and after he'd been told that their baby girl hadn't made it, he was still powerless to do anything but struggle to accept the fate that had been decided for them.

"I wish to god I'd found that son of a bitch first that night!" he said to himself. When he'd taken the gun from the safe, he had every intention of using it that night. His father always told him that there is no such thing as too far when it comes to a man protecting his family but he'd never fully understood until Olivia came into his life and suddenly he knew. Now, thinking back to that night, he knew that had he gotten to him first, he would have easily put a bullet in Elliot's head and not felt even the slightest bit of remorse.

He never heard Olivia's bare feet as they made their way down the hall and into the room, nor did he hear her walk over to the windows, he'd only become aware of her presence when he felt her body pressed against him as she slipped her arms underneath his and around his waist from behind.

"You okay?" she whispered. He turned to face her and was greeted by her beautiful smile

"Yeah, couldn't sleep" he said as he allowed his fingers to run through her long, soft waves "What are you doing up?"

"I'm hungry"

"We skipped dinner didn't we?" he suddenly remembered

"We did"

"Well, I didn't so much skip, it was more like taken away" he grinned. "How about the three of us head to the kitchen and heat up the leftovers?"

"Can we find an old movie to watch while we eat?"

"You kidding? That's the best of a midnight binge!" he agreed as they walked off

* * *

.

**Cassidy home…**

Brian and Alex were in bed fast asleep when the phone began ringing, piercing the silence of the night. it was Brian who first began to stir and quickly reached for the phone so that it wouldn't wake his sleeping wife.

"Yeah, hello" he said, still half asleep

"Brian, hey it's Fin, listen I'm sorry for callin so late"

"Nah man it's fine, what's goin on?"

"We got a serious problem; I need to talk to Alex" Fin said urgently. Brian paused briefly, letting those words sink in, afraid to ask his next question. so instead…

"Yeah, hold on a sec…" Brian said as he sat up then turned to Alex and put his hand on her shoulder to lightly shake her "Al, babe, wake up" he called softly

"What's wrong?" she asked as she pulled from her sleep and turned to her husband.

"It's Fin, he says there's a problem"

Alex froze as she stared at the phone in her husband's hand, wondering if it was news about either of her best friends.

"Babe?" Brian called to her

"Yeah…" he nervously took the phone from his hand and put it to her ear "Fin…what um…"

"Don't worry, it's not another murder" He assured her, soothing the panic he heard in her voice. She immediately let out a sigh of relief.

"They're okay!" she cried, thankful that Liv and Casey were safe, Brian feeling that relief right along with her.

"But there's been a direct threat, you need to get down here

"Threat…to whom?" she asked as she got out of bed

"To Liv. Faust left us audio of Jessica and Dr. Russo's murders along with a note; I called forensics to run the prints…"

"What did the note say?"

"That the recordings are so Liv knows what to expect when it's her turn"

Alex went white as a ghost, her heart dropping to her feet as she was stunned into silence.

"Alex?" Fin called, unsure if she was still there.

"I'm on my way!" she said and hung up the phone

"What the hell's goin on?" Brian asked, feeling as frightened as his wife looked

"Faust made a threat against Liv…I need to go!" she said, giving him a quick kiss before she walked off to get dressed.

* * *

_He had to admit, he hadn't planned on taking her out just yet, in fact, she was to be last – his special project and he had planned to take his time with her, his golden kill! _

"_But hey, life's a crapshoot and your number's up!" he said as he looked down at the picture in his hand. It hadn't been an accident that the knife had gone through her photo; he thought of it more as fate – divine intervention guiding his hand. Besides, what did it matter the order in which he got them? As long as he made sure that each and every one of the useless whores suffered up until the moment they drew their last breaths, all would be right with the world._

_As he stood outside the place, he thought how perfect it was to go after her tonight instead of laying low, waiting a while for the next kill like he'd planned. No one would be expecting it tonight after just finding Russo's body and even with their so called "manhunt" going on, once again, he slipped right past the stupid pigs and was ready to do himself and this bitch a favor and end her miserable life._

"_cunt's walking right into my trap!" he said as he got off of the elevator and made his way to the room where she would take her last breath…_

* * *

_._

**Langan apartment…**

Later, midnight dinner and a movie led to sensuous kisses and romantic whispers in the dark which led to discarded robes and Trevor's head ending up between Olivia's legs, his mouth and fingers working her into a frenzy that in spite of her best efforts to be quiet out of respect for the hour and the neighbors, left her screaming as she came. Trevor laughed as he came up for air and kissed her lips.

"You keep screaming like that and someone's gonna call the cops" he said as he pushed his cock inside her.

"I am the cops!" she cried out as she arched her back and greedily devoured his mouth with her kiss, her arms and legs snaked around his neck and waist, pulling him ever closer. She'd barely come down from the orgasm he'd just given her with his mouth and now, fucking her hard and fast and hitting her g spot at the perfect angle, he was quickly coaxing another from her and there was no being quiet as she again came undone.

….

At the sixteenth, after calling in Alex and Commissioner Reagan concerning the threat they'd gotten, it was decided that Olivia's protective detail would start tonight, right now and police were filling squad cars to rush over to her apartment as well as to she and Trevor's home, since detail had now been ordered for Casey as well.

"We can't just barge in at almost 2 in the morning" Fin protested as he and Murphy got in the car, him in the driver's seat "We need to give a heads up" he said as he dialed Olivia's cell.

….

"Holy fucking God!" Olivia panted as Trevor lay on top of her in a sweaty heap, his head on her breasts as she held him and they both fought to steady their breathing. "That was amazing!" she exclaimed, still trembling from the intensity of it all.

"YOU are amazing!" he said, looking up at her and catching her lips in a kiss just as the phone rang and their bliss was suddenly replaced by panic thinking that a call this late would only be coming if there were something wrong with the children. Trevor immediately sat up and reached for their robes, as Olivia reached over her head for her phone that sat on the end table, flinching as Trevor pulled out of her so abruptly.

"Case?" she answered anxiously with the phone on speaker, not bothering to check the display as she too sat up and Trevor handed her her robe

"No, Liv it's Fin" that did nothing to ease her anxiety

"Fin, what's going on?" Trevor asked, hearts still pounding while he and Olivia covered themselves.

"Lieutenant Benson, we're on our way to you, Sergeant Tutuola and me" Murphy interjected

"Lieutenant Murphy? Why?" Olivia asked "what…?"

"Everybody is safe if that's what you mean" Fin assured her

"Then why…?"

"Because Paul Faust has issued a direct threat against you and your protective detail starts now!" Murphy informed her before Fin could speak. Trevor's eyes went wide with fright as he looked over at Olivia for an explanation.

"Threat? Protective detail…what the fuck is he talking about and who is this Lieutenant Murphy?" Trevor demanded, surprising even himself at his choice of language.

"Fin, I'll see you when you get here" Olivia said and quickly ended the call

"Olivia?!"

"He's my replacement" she said sheepishly

"Your replacement…what the hell is going on?"

"The thing I said that happened at work that I needed to tell you about? He's sort of the thing" Trevor again looked at her, now even more confused "Why don't we get some clothes on before they get here and I'll tell you as much as I can" Trevor paused, wanting to speak but having been stunned into silence, he just nodded absently and followed Olivia to their bedroom.

* * *

_From the moment she walked in and was blitzed, she never stopped fighting even for a moment, determined that her life would not end this way; not here, not tonight, and certainly not by his hands but her determination was no match for his rage and he'd bludgeoned her into submission with the desk lamp after he'd beaten her violently with his fists, nearly destroying every bone in her face and breaking several others in her body but stopping before he'd killed her so that she would be awake and aware as he mounted and raped her, the severity of which depended on how much time he had and it would be a while before anyone realized that she would be in need of help. _

_She lay beneath him unable to scream and choking on her own blood but feeling every ounce of the pain he inflicted on her body. After he'd raped her with his member, he now viciously tore into her with the statue of liberty paperweight that she'd beaten him with when the initial struggle began. She could feel her insides being shredded as he thrust it mercilessly in and out with brute force._

"_You like that, bitch? How does it feel to get fucked the same way you fucked me?" he taunted, giving one final thrust on the statue before pulling it out and tossing it across the room. Then, looking down at her, he decided to have one last go and turned her over onto her stomach and forced another anal assault on her, pummeling her hard as he pulled her head back. As he came, spilling himself into her, he reached for his knife and pulled it across her throat, ripping it open and sending blood shooting everywhere then dropped her dying body onto the floor and readjusted himself before he went about stabbing her repeatedly, stopping only when his anger allayed then carved a giant number 3 between her breasts, grabbing his recorder and leaving, security paying him no attention as he casually exited the building and disappeared underground when he entered the subway just a block away._

* * *

_._

**Langan home…**

Travis was wide awake pacing the house with a very upset Noah in his arms. The toddler had woken up twenty minutes ago and hadn't stopped crying since, his little mouth in agony from the teeth that had been pushing their way through for the last couple weeks. After trying everything to soothe him, Travis went downstairs so that the crying wouldn't wake anyone and walked the house with his nephew, hoping to get him back to sleep. Semper and Jax noticed the baby's frustration and immediately came over to help, licking at his little feet in an attempt to make him laugh but Noah only smiled briefly at the tickly sensation before bursting into tears again.

"Aw, buddy Semper and Jax want to play" Travis cooed

"No doggie, want mama!" Noah cried. Travis, finally at his wits end, headed to the kitchen and opened the freezer.

"Your mom asks, this never happened!" he said to Noah as he took a popsicle from the freezer and quickly unwrapped it, sticking it in the toddlers mouth and massaging his sore gums with the frozen treat. Noah's cries quickly slowed to sniffles as the taste of the sugar hit his tongue followed by the cold and numbing sensation that quickly began to take effect on his gums and within seconds, a serious look plastered his little face as he put all of his focus into gnawing on that popsicle, grinding his gums on it and drooling as he grunted happily and looked at his uncle with sincere gratitude.

"Dude, you're welcome!" Travis said, eliciting a smile from the baby who continued with his popsicle "And we didn't wake anybody!" he grinned, pleased with himself and sat Noah in his high chair just as the phone rang. Travis answered it on the first ring.

"Guys, the kids are fine" he said, assuming that it would only be Liv or Trevor calling the house at this hour.

"Travis, it's Alex. I'm on my way there but I need you to let Casey know that we have a serious problem."

"Everything alright?" he asked

"Everything's fine for now" Alex said without further elaboration..

"Yeah, I'll let her know but what…?"

"We'll talk when I get there" she said and ended the call.

…..

Back at Trevor and Olivia's apartment, he sat dumbfounded as she told him the last of the details about Faust and why she'd been sent on leave and ordered protective detail.

"Why didn't you tell me any of this earlier?" he asked

"I planned to but we kind of got sidetracked"

"Sidetracked? Olivia, this is your life! No matter what little squabble we may have gone through, there is nothing more important than your safety and wellbeing; NOTHING!"

"I'm sorry, but if it's any consequence, I swear I was going to tell you first thing in the morning. I just wanted to try to fix things and have a night of normal before it all went crazy."

"Just the thought of losing you…" the words died on his lips and he pulled her into his arms.

"You won't, I promise!" she said and plied his face with several kisses before kissing his mouth "I love you!"

"I love you too…and I'm going to guess that since this also involves my equally haphazard sister-in-law, Travis also has no idea what's going on"

"I'm sure he does now?" Olivia said and offered a smile.

….

Downstairs in the lobby, several police officers, Lead by Fin and Murphy had just entered the building and made their way to the elevators as the concierge looked on curiously.

"Can I…help you?" he asked as the officers loaded into the elevator when the doors opened. Fin turned around, looking quite annoyed…

"No" he said with a scowl and went on about his business.

...

Upstairs in the apartment after getting formalities out of the way, Trevor sat with Murphy, Fin and Olivia's newly assigned detail, detectives Martin and Leight, while the other officers waited downstairs in the lobby.

"What about this threat you mentioned?" Olivia asked as she entered carrying a tray of coffee that she sat down on the table and took a seat beside her husband as everyone took a mug.

"Faust left a package for you in front of the precinct along with this note" Fin answered as he handed Olivia the letter that was now sealed in plastic

""So you know what to expect when it's your turn"" Olivia read out loud, the seriousness of the situation now crystal clear. Trevor reached for her hand, feeling angry and sick at the blatant threat his man had made against his wife.

"He will never come near you; I'll kill the son of a bitch before I let that happen!" Trevor vowed. Olivia squeezed his hand tight, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by Fin. She was scared and he could see it and he dreaded having to tell her the rest.

"What was in the package…what did he want me to see?"

"Liv, you don't…"

"Fin…please. We already know that the threat's been made, I need to know" Fin sighed and looked over at Murphy, then at Trevor who simply nodded.

"Not see…hear" Fin corrected as he slid the recorder across the coffee table to Olivia.

"What is it?" she asked, afraid to know the answer and began nervously rubbing her stomach, feeling sickness churning. It was Murphy who spoke up

"Along with that letter, Faust sent you audio recordings of the rapes and murders of Jessica Morgan and Dr. Angela Russo."

"Liv, you don't have to listen to it" Fin interjected, knowing what hearing Jessica's death as it happened would do to her.

"I want to"

"Honey…" Trevor objected

"It was sent to _me!_ No matter how much Commissioner Reagan tries to keep me away from this case, I'm in the middle of it, why doesn't he let me do my job and help find this sick freak before he kills again?"

"Because, Lieutenant, you know as well as the rest of us that you cannot be in charge of a manhunt when you are the target of the man you are hunting!" Murphy continued

"Play it" Olivia ordered dismissively, tired of being told that she can't do her job effectively.

"Liv are you sure you want…" Fin began

"Play it" she repeated. Reluctantly, Fin hit play on the recorder and the room fell silent as Jessica's screams filled the air.

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

"What is this?" Travis asked Alex as she, Nick and Amanda rushed into the house and he saw the barrage of squad cars outside. He had finally gotten Noah back to sleep and didn't want the commotion to disturb him.

"Casey 's Protective detail" Alex answered. "This is detective Fox and detective Cohen"

"Hello" the two men greeted in unison, moving to shake Travis' hand but he ignored them and turned his attention back to Alex.

"Counselor, what is this? Why does my wife need protective detail?"

"She didn't tell you? "Alex sighed angrily and ran her hand through her hair "Jesus Case! Get her ass down here!" she demanded

"I would but she's not here?" Travis said

"What do you mean she'd not here? I said to let her know we were on our way and you said ok!"

"I meant that I'd call her and give her the message"

"Where did she go?" Alex asked

"Her office; She got a call around eleven, said there was some emergency that needed her attention, she's still there."

"Have you talked to her?" Amaro asked. Travis was now agitated and extremely nervous

"What?"

"Have you talked to her?" Nick repeated louder, urgently

"No, I…not since she called to tell me she'd gotten there safe." He stammered

"What time was that?"

"I don't know… a little after midnight?" Travis guessed.

"Dear God!"Amanda cried, the realization hitting her hard

"What the hell is going on?" Travis demanded to know

"Bait and switch" Alex uttered, terrified and suddenly feeling sick to her stomach

"He sent the threat to Liv…" Nick began

"So he'd be free to go after Casey…" Amanda finished

"Call dispatch, get every available unit over to the Manhattan EADA's office, NOW!"Alex ordered her officers.

* * *

.

**Casey's office…**

Fin and Murphy arrived on the scene that was already littered with dispatch units and found police tape had already been placed to cordon off the building.

"What do we have?" Murphy asked

"Somebody did a real number on her" The detective said as he led Fin and Murphy down the corridor to the office "I mean face smashed, throat slit, stab wounds…I don't even wanna say what was done below the belt!" the young detective continued "It's all yours! He said and walked away as the first Fin then Murphy entered the office to see Casey lying there in the middle of the floor, naked except her bra. Her face and body had been beaten to a pulp and her throat had been ripped open. Fin continued to access the damage and quickly saw that the officer had been right, what had been done to her down below was the most horrifying thing of all – between her open legs was nothing more than a gaping, shredded hole that had not even the slightest semblance to what it once was.

"How did we let this happen?" Fin said aloud to no one in particular as he fell to his knees beside the woman he'd called friend and hanged his head in sorrow.

"I promise you, sergeant" Murphy said as he took in the sight before him "We will get him!"

* * *

.

**I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I am so, so sorry and even sorrier to say that the next chapter doesn't get much better. To those of you who continue to keep reading, thank you and to those who choose to stop, I understand. Talk to me either way. Until next time!**


	8. Gloating

**I KNOW, I KNOW, I SUCK FOR WHAT I DID. BUT I GAVE FLUFF! I GAVE FLUFF DAMNIT! I KNOW THAT WHAT HAPPENED UPSET YOU GUYS AND I'M SORRY BUT IT ALL HAS TO HAPPEN. THIS CHAPTER ISN'T AN EASY ONE, IT DEALS WITH THE AFTEREFFECTS AND, WELL JUST READ IT AND MUCH THANKS TO THOSE OF YOU ARE STILL WITH ME, I APPRECIATE THE LOVE MORE THAN YOU KNOW AND THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR THE WONDERFUL REVIEWS. THAT BEING SAID, WE PICK UP WHERE WE LEFT OFF, DICK WOLF OWNS THE SVU CHARACTERS, I OWN FAUST'S CRAZY ASS! CAN YOU FEEL MY GLEE? ENJOY!**

* * *

**Reader comment:**

**Bobbie23 chapter 7 . Aug 18**

**Oh my god! I think my heart actually stopped when I realised it was Casey, I was expecting Donnelly through the whole thing. The loving moment with the kids in the last chapter makes this one even more heart breaking. As much as the graphic detail makes me cringe and wince, I'm glad you included it because it adds so much to the story and wants Faust stopped before he can do anymore.**  
**Completely agree with your note about Wolf, we would be more productive, but please don't let that discourage you from working on the next chapter (quickly, please?).**  
**Also, Martin and Leight, Fox and Cohen? Nice.**

* * *

To Lynnesha, your comment was rude and very disrespectful. You have a right to feel anger over what I wrote but you do not have a right to approach me in such a classless, tasteless and downright ignorant manner – GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!

* * *

.

It had been two days since Casey had been viciously murdered by Paul Faust and her death had hit their family harder than any of them would have imagined and Trevor found himself being the glue that had to hold everything together. His parents grieved as would any who'd lost a daughter that they loved very much but his mother took it especially hard. The attachments she'd grown to both her daughters were nothing short of amazing to her sons. Tricia Langan never saw any woman as good enough for her boys and had sabotaged many a relationship throughout their adult lives but when Olivia and then Casey had come along, something in Tricia shifted and even with the baggage that came with the two women, she embraced them openly and loved them both without judgment or condition and grew fiercely protective of them, her heart being completely broken by the news.

...

**Casey's office, two days prior...**

When Olivia and Trevor had rushed over to the scene, he wasn't allowed through but she'd gotten past the police with her badge, the officers unaware that she shouldn't have been there and when she got to the door of Casey's office and saw her lying there, she crumbled inside.

"Lieutenant, you are not supposed to be here!" Murphy scolded but Olivia paid him no attention as she stood in shock at the sight in front of her. Fin had to physically pull her away before she could step into that office.

But Travis…Travis was inconsolable. He'd arrived at the crime scene with Alex, seen the carnage, seen his wife lying there lifeless and desecrated in the aftermath of what that animal had done to her. He'd cradled her naked, broken body; screaming while he begged God to take it back.

"Just breathe! Doll please just breathe for me…PLEASE…please… don't leave me." he said in a whisper as his tears fell in torrents

"Travis, we need to take her" Melinda said gently

"GET AWAY FROM HER!" he screamed then looked down at his wife in his arms "Please breathe for me" he begged. "We were supposed to go to Paris…she loves Paris" he gently caressed her face, his tears falling onto her bloodied skin as he spoke to her "I promised to take you every year…this is gonna be our 5th …doll please…we have to go to Paris…I can't let you miss Paris!" he sobbed brokenly as he rocked her lifeless body and forth.

It took over an hour before Travis would let go and let the M.E. take her away. Trevor insisted that Travis come home with he and Olivia but Travis refused saying that he wanted to be in their home, with her things. Olivia, seeing the state that Travis was in, begged Trevor to stay with him. She would go home and have her children there, Travis was alone and he needed his brother more than she did in that moment. Trevor was reluctant – all things considered but he knew that Olivia was right and reluctantly allowed her detail to take her home to the children and worried that she hadn't reacted at all.

…

"You're an idiot, Martin! Michael Jackson wore the glove on his left hand!" Detective Leight argued to his partner while shoving chili fries into his mouth.

"Bite me, he wore it on the right!" Detective Martin argued back

"I followed the Thriller –"

"Here we go again…" Martin said, rolling her eyes

"It's true, I followed the Thriller tour through 18 cities in 1984 and I had front row seats in 12 of those cities and in Toronto, I'll never forget it, Michael pulled me up on stage while he sang Billie Jean - the glove was on the left, I- Lieutenant" he said when he saw Olivia and Trevor approach. "Counselor"

"Please see to it that she gets home safe" Trevor asked

"Absolutely." Detective Martin assured "Lieutenant, if you're ready…"

Olivia looked back at Trevor with sad eyes as she held on to his hand.

"Are you sure you'll…" he started

"I'm sure. Take care of Travis" she said near a whisper. Trevor leaned in and kissed her.

"Call me the very second you walk in the door!" Olivia nodded, tears stinging her eyes but she wouldn't cry them. instead, she hugged he husband before turning to leave with her detail.

* * *

.

**Trevor and Casey's home present…**

Now here they were, the afternoon of day two and things went from bad to worse. Trevor had driven into the city to check on Travis and he'd arrived at the townhouse where Travis and Casey had lived together. Trevor walked through the front door to be met with darkness and stifling heat. They were in the middle of an August heat wave and Travis hadn't bothered to turn on the air or even open the windows. Trevor stopped in the entryway and opened the drapes to let in the afternoon sun then found the thermostat and switched the air on.

"Travis?" he called as he made his way to the living room which was also black. Thankfully Trevor was familiar with the layout of the house and easily made his way to the windows to open those drapes as well.

"I wanted it dark you know!" Travis grumbled, his eyes glaring from the light from the armchair where he sat slumped with an almost empty bottle of Jack dangling precariously from his fingertips

"It's three o'clock" Trevor protested

"So!" Travis said angrily and took another swig. His clothes were rumpled, eyes still red-rimmed and swollen and his face was covered with 2 days of stubble.

"Man, how much of this stuff have you had?" Trevor asked as he snatched the bottle way from his brother.

"All of it!" Travis confessed without looking up at his brother

"Travis…" Trevor said as he sat on the coffee table in front of his brother "I know you're hurting-"

"Hurting?" Travis said and gave a laugh then dragged his palm down his face "I'm uh…I'm…" he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and buried his head in his hands, sobbing.

"Travvie?" Trevor called softly to his brother, putting his hand on Travis' shoulder to comfort him but Travis continued to cry for a long moment, sobbing pitifully. Finally, he forced himself to look up at his big brother and with tears running down his face…

"The autopsy…Warner, she…she was pregnant"

"What?" Trevor ask in total shock

"We had a mishap a couple moths back… but neither of us thought…10 weeks" Travis answered through his sobs

"…and you guys didn't know…" Travis shook his head as he wiped his nose with his sleeve.

"She told me the night that we watched the kids…she was ready to start looking into adoption. She knew how much I wanted to be a dad and she wasn't afraid anymore." Trevor couldn't stop his own tears

"I'm so sorry" Trevor wept

"It was healthy. When Warner found the baby she tested…somehow, Case hadn't transmitted…our baby would have been born healthy…it was a boy"

"My God…"

"My wife…our son…one phone call took everything away. One stupid phone call! Why did I let her go; how could I be so stupid?!" he sobbed

"This was not your fault!"

"She was my whole world…now, I have nothing! I might as well be dead with them!"

"Oh Travvie!" Trevor exclaimed as he pulled his brother in and threw his arms around him "Please don't say that! I love you, you hear me?" he kissed his little brother then held him tighter "I love you and I'm here for you! When we lost Chloe and Liv checked out, you were the one who kept me going; you were the one who didn't let me drown and I swear to you baby brother, I am going get you through this, no matter what; I will never let you fall!" he promised as they cried together.

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

"How's Travis?" Olivia asked as soon as Trevor entered the kitchen after having just arrived home. She didn't turn to look at her husband but instead continued scouring the already immaculate space.

"Not Good" he answered as he made his way over to his wife where she stood scrubbing what he could only think had to be imagined dirt from the kitchen sink. He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"The kids asleep?"

"You just missed them" she said as she pulled her cleaning gloves off and rinsed the sink, finally satisfied that it was clean enough.

"You alright?"

"Yeah" she said as he broke from his arms "You must be hungry, why don't you sit down and I'll get your dinner."

"Have you eaten?" he asked as he took a seat at the island

"I tried, I…"

"Honey…"

"I know...I just can't keep anything down right now" she said as she busied herself with preparing a plate for him.

"Liv, maybe it would help if we talked about it"

"Talked about what?" she asked, still refusing to look at him

"About Casey; Liv, it's been two days and you haven't cried even once. I'm worried about you."

"Don't, I'm fine." She assured him and set his plate in front of him

"You're not fine. I can…"

"Trevor!" she began to yell but reeled herself in and took a breath, resuming with a calmer voice "I don't need to talk, I don't need to cry. I'm fine!" she lied again. Trevor reached across the counter and very gently took her hand in his, running his thumb across the back and looking up at her. For a brief second, she averted her eyes but quickly found his and allowed him to hold her gaze.

"I'm worried about you" he said so softly, it sounded like a whisper

"I know" she whispered as she reached out and caressed his face. "but I'll be ok" she leaned in and kissed him then forced a smile. "Eat before it gets cold. I'm gonna go take a nice…tepid bubble bath" she grinned as she gently patted her stomach.

"I love you" he said, knowing that she wasn't okay but also understanding that she needed space to grieve in her own way right now.

"I love you too"

...

"…_meaning, we don't actually know that there's anything to be worried about" _

As she lay soaking in the bathtub, Olivia's mind wandered to what Casey had said in her office that day; she had been near her, hugged her… then just as quickly she saw that office again, saw her best friend, her sister lying there in a pool of her own blood. Her throat slashed, her mouth agape as if it had frozen mid-scream.

"No!" she said, quickly shaking the memory away as she wiped the tears that were now rolling down her face. this was the very reason why she had to keep herself busy; she couldn't let herself dwell on it – any of it because to do so made it real and if it was real then Casey was really gone and if Casey was gone, then that meant that this was real! That her life was in jeopardy, that at any time, she could become his next victim, that it could be _her _husband falling apart, her children left without her. No, she wouldn't allow herself to think about it because even when she did, she just didn't know how to wrap her mind around the fact that she would never see Casey again; never hear her laughter or see her smile…

"Damn it Novak!" she cried, burying her face in her palms as she let her tars fall in private, away from Trevor. She couldn't have him worrying about her when Travis was so beside himself, especially with the news of the pregnancy.

"We were having babies together and didn't even know it!"

…

**Later that night...**

_Olivia ran and ran through the dark corridor, trying every door she passed, praying that one would open and give her a place to hide, offer a barrier between herself and the monster who was quick on her heels and determined to make her his next victim but none would give. Door after door she frantically tried each handle, only to be met with the resistance for the locks, her heart threatening to pound its' way out of her body and she suddenly felt sick to her stomach._

"_I won't let him hurt you" she promised the child inside her but she was completely gripped by fear and as tears of terror streamed her face, she wondered if it would be a promise that she could keep. Continuing to run, she tried the next door that appeared after several yards only to find it locked as well. She could hear fast approaching footsteps down the hall and began banging her palm against the glass panel._

"_HELP MEEEE!" she screamed, desperately shaking the doorknob, the very air she needed to survive now thick and heavy and threatening to choke her as her chest heaved in erratic gasps. Suddenly, a creaking sound caught her attention and she turned her head to see that a door was slowly opening further down the hall. Without wasting a second, she again put her feet in gear and ran the distance to the open door, stepping inside the semi-lit room and finding herself startled when the door slammed shut behind her. _

_After nearly jumping out of her skin, she quickly turned around to be sure that he hadn't followed her inside and checked to make sure that the door was locked. Satisfied that she was safe for now, she released a breath of relief as she rubbed her stomach._

"_We're gonna be okay little one" she assured her baby but that assurance quickly dissipated when Faust began trying to break down the door. _

"_You can't hide from me you stupid whore!" Faust yelled from the other side of the door while trying to tear it off the hinges. She covered her mouth with both of her hands, praying that he wouldn't hear her whimpering cries and just go away._

"_OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" _

_The banging got worse and the door began shaking. Her body was trembling with terror coursing through her veins and she took a step back, and then another, then another and another as the banging continued until her legs came in contact with a sofa and she stumbled backwards onto it, putting her hand down to steady her landing as she fell into a sitting position only to find that her hand had come into contact with something wet…very wet._

_She looked down and screamed in sheer horror at seeing that not only was she sitting on Casey's corpse whose lifeless eyes stared back at her, but her hand had landed and was lodged in what was left of Casey's neck where it had been ripped open._

"_Your turn bitch!" Faust said as he busted through the door._

As he was putting Noah back to bed, Trevor was startled by the sound of his wife screaming from their bedroom.

"Olivia!" he called to her as he shut the nursery door and made a dash down the hall to their room, quickly turning on the light once inside. Olivia was thrashing about in the sheets as pained, horrifying and terror filled screams tore from her throat over and over. Trevor ran to her, climbing onto the bed and trying to wake her up. Suddenly, her eyes shot open and she bolted upright gasping for air in her disoriented state as she looked around the room and then over at her husband before throwing herself into his arms, her body collapsing and shaking hard against his as she began sobbing uncontrollably. Just as Martin and Leight came bursting through the door, guns drawn and Leight completely out of breath.

"We heard…" he panted, hunched over with his hands on his knees "We heard…" he put up a finger to signal that he needed a minute.

"We heard screams. Everything ok?" Martin asked

"just a bad dream" Trevor assured them, never taking his attention from his wife.

"Okay…" Martin said. We're outside if you need us. Trevor paid no attention as they left and shut the door

"You're ok... I got you; it's just a dream" he said soothingly as he held Olivia tight and kissed her head but his words were missed. She was hysterical and could only choke out pitiful, gut-wrenching cries as she held on to her husband for dear life and Trevor sat trying desperately to soothe her after the horrifying nightmare that left her trembling. And now suddenly, in the face of Casey's death, the truth about Chloe that had begun to rattle him didn't seem so urgent. He would tell his wife the truth, he knew that he had to but right now, getting his family through this horror that had befallen them was paramount to everything else.

* * *

.

**Cassidy home…**

Alex sat in the dark nursery with a sleeping Jake in her arms as the rocking chair slowly moved back and forth. The toddler's sleep had again been disturbed by teething pain and having his mother nurse him was the only thing that would soothe him however, he'd gone back to sleep well over an hour ago but Alex found herself unable to put him down and was content to hold and sing softly to her sleeping boy, finding that it helped the pain that was threatening to crush her soul.

Usually on nights like this she would be up texting Olivia who would be up with Noah for the same reason and then they'd wake up Casey. Once they'd get their little ones back to bed, they'd each sneak off to a quiet room away from their sleeping husbands and children and call each other, laughing and talking practically all night so even when work and family would drag them through long periods where they couldn't get together, their late night text and call sessions were something they looked forward to. Tonight however…

"How could this have happened?" Alex asked herself quietly as she found herself crying again. It was all she'd done these last two days, even when giving statements to the press she was powerless to keep her emotions in check and had made the cover of many a newspaper with tears streaming her face. She allowed her hand to smooth Jake's hair then caress his little cheek before reaching to swat the tears that ran down her own.

"Babe" Brian called softly as he entered the room

"Hey" Alex said as she looked up at him, forcing a smile.

"It's late, why don't come to bed?"

"I should, I just…every time I close my eyes…" she started and began to weep.

"Tell me what to do…tell me how to make this better for you, how to make it easier" he implored as he took her hand.

"I don't know…I don't think you can."

Brian stood there unsure of what to say. He wasn't hurt by her words, just saddened because he knew that they were true. His wife Casey and Olivia shared an unbelievably close bond. When one hurt, they all felt it, but this…this went beyond hurt and he and Trevor were both going out of their minds. They both wanted more than anything to be what got Liv and Alex through this but both men found themselves pushed away; their wives seeking comfort only in each other these last two days.

"You want me to put Jake down?"

"No. I just wanna hold him a little longer." She refused

"Okay." Feeling dispirited, Brian turned to leave the nursery and had made it to the door when…

"She was pregnant" Alex softly, her voice painfully full of emotion. Brian turned around to look at his wife in complete disbelief.

"How was that even…Travis never told me…"

"He didn't know; neither of them did. There had been an accident a little while ago…Casey was freaked out about it…Melinda found the baby during the autopsy. I got the preliminary report this morning"

"This just keeps getting worse…I can't even imagine what Travis is going through!"

* * *

.

**Travis and Casey's home…**

"_Hey, this is Casey, I missed you but please leave a message and I promise to return your call as soon as I can."_

The beep sounded and Travis paused before he began speaking.

"Doll…it's me. I don't know what I'm doing, I just…I needed to hear your voice. I feel so alone. Case, I can't do this without you!" he sobbed "I need you…I need my best friend. Please come home…please! Don't leave me like this…just come home!" he begged through his cries.

…

"_You know counselor, I gotta say, you were one sweet piece of pussy!" Faust said as he sat talking to Casey's picture "Definitely the best so far…I bet somebody is cryin a fuckin river over losing that! Too bad, if you hadn't been such a dumb slut he would still have it…not that there's much left to have after I got through. Did you enjoy having me rip that pretty cunt to shreds?"_

_He gave a wicked laugh, suddenly finding himself becoming hard and unzipped his pants, freeing his semi-erect penis then spitting in his hand before he began stroking himself, getting harder and more aroused as he replayed Casey's screams in his head._

"_Three down, two to go…mmmmm" he moaned" And I can't wait to get inside that cop bitch!" he continued to get himself off, growling as he came and released himself all over Casey's picture._

"_Only makeup a woman ever truly needs!" he grinned as he readjusted himself."And now, for my next trick…"_

* * *

_._

**The following morning…**

Brian was out for his usual crack-of-dawn run and was on his way home, stopping at the newsstand like he always did to grab his morning paper. He was reaching for the Times when his attention was drawn to the front page of the Ledger.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

…..

At the Langan home, Trevor was down in the kitchen at 6am putting on a pot of coffee when he got a text. He grabbed his phone from the counter and quickly opened it when he saw that it was from Brian.

_Front page of the Ledger _the caption read and when Trevor saw the attachment he immediately turned to the kitchen sink and threw up, clumsily dropping his phone into the mess!

…

On his way in to work, Fin grabbed a coffee from the food truck and then went to the neighboring newsstand, dropping his cup when he saw the Ledger and quickly snatch up a copy, anger coursing through him when he saw the cover.

"I DON'T BELIEVE THIS SHIT!" he exclaimed, paid for the paper and went inside the precinct.

Upstairs, he stormed into the squad room where only Amanda, Nick and a few of the unis were at this early hour.

"Get commissioner Reagan on the phone, now!" he barked

"Why?" Nick asked

"Those assholes at the Ledger!" he seethed as he angrily slammed the paper down on his desk just as Murphy walked out of the office, quickly picking it up.

"Dear God!" he exclaimed in utter shock and disgust.

"I'm gonna be sick!" Amanda cried.

There on the front page of the once respected newspaper under the headline "Let's take a selfie!" was a full page, color closeup of Paul Faust smiling into the camera beside a dead Casey; her slit throat and broken, bloody face in gory, graphic detail for all of New York to see!"

"Son of a bitch!" Nick exclaimed.

"Would somebody like to tell me what the hell is going on around here?! I'm gone a few weeks and the city has gone insane!"

"Judge Donnelly?" Fin said incredulously

"Hello Sergeant Tutuola. Where's Benson?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I got her message and cut my vacation short when I heard about Novak. I hear this psycho has his eye on me as well."

"We have every reason to believe so" Murphy said

"And you are?"

"Lt. Declan Murphy. I'm filling in for Lt. Benson while she's been assigned leave and you are in very real danger!"

"Not nearly as much as Faust will be in if he tries!" Liz said matter-of-factly.

* * *

.

**I know…**


	9. Monkey Wrench

**Y'ALL DONT KNOW THE HELL I WENT THROUGH TO GET THIS CHAPTER. WORST CASE OF WRITER'S BLOCK EVER! AND DURING THOSE MOMENTS WHEN I WOULD CLEAR…I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE HAD A STORY FIGHT ME SO HARD…EVER! IT FOUGHT ME SO HARD THAT I LITERALLY ALMOST GAVE UP AND WAS READY TO SAY TO HELL WITH IT BUT I DIDN'T AND HERE WE ARE, CHAPTER 9, YAY! I DECIDED TO GO A BIT LIGHTER WITH THIS CHAPTER BUT DON'T WORRY, THE HORROR WILL BE BACK SOON ENOUGH. THAT BEING SAID, DICK WOLF OWNS THE SVU CHARACTERS IN USE, I OWN MY STORY. ENJOY!**

* * *

**Reader comments. I honestly wanted to post every review I got from the last chapter, you all rock but i couldn't so I chose 4.**

**Lauren chapter 8 . Sep 4**

**This whole chapter broke my heart! My heart is in two crushed, broken-hearted pieces. Thank God this is only fan fic! :/ I need fluff, where's the fluff? Lol.**

**Mariskafan2364 chapter 8 . Aug 27**

**Your doing an excelent job with this story because I had to stop reading three times because you made me cry. That piece of shit needs to die. He doesn't deserve a trial I hope when the cops find him they just shoot his ass it will be justifiable. Olivia needs to stop keeping everthing bottled up and share what she's feeling with Trevor. It's not good for the baby. I'm looking forward to the next chapter even if you did make me cry while reading this one.**

******Saradawn723 chapter 8 . Aug 27**

**Why do you do this to me? You like to rip my heart out and chop it up in a million pieces? I thought so like . Poor Travis. I legit almost cried I hate you. You killed another baby! Why?! You said you wouldn't! I'll never trust you again! We're in a fight. Not really, but really. I'm sad. Fuck Faust. Not really, but fucker needs to die.**

******Guest chapter 8 . Aug 27**

**The only makeup a woman ever truly needs.**  
**I can say that this was the sickest thing I have ever heard, but I like it.**  
**I like the creativity.**  
**I have heard a few foul things but this one caught me off guard**

**Lauren - this chapter is fluffesque, lol! Mariskafan2364 - so sorry but I appreciate the deep emotion! Saradawn723 - I apologize for the inhumanity of my actions; no more dead babies...for real this time. And to the guest reviewer - I truly love you for liking that!**

* * *

.

"_Push Olivia!" the doctor ordered. She was in the home stretch and needed just a couple more for it to be over._

"_I'm trying!" she cried, pushing with all her strength through the blinding pain that wracked her body "Oh God, where's Trevor, why isn't he here?"_

"_I told you, he's on his way."_

"_I need him NOW!"_

"_I SAID PUSH, NOW QUIT WHINING YOU STUPID FUCKING WHORE!" the doctor suddenly yelled, pulling off his face mask to reveal himself as Faust._

"_NO!" Olivia cried as she backed away from him and got off the delivery table but the baby was coming out and she barely made it a few shaky steps before she leaned against the wall and doubled over._

"_I got a better idea, why don't I just cut the little bitch out of you?" Faust taunted, taking slow, deliberate steps toward as her agony sent her sliding down the wall to the floor._

"_Please don't" she panted, holding her belly protectively as her body went against her will and took over, and forced her to push although she tried to fight it._

"_Don't worry, it'll be over quick!" he grinned as he stroked her hair then raised the knife high in the air._

"_TREVOOOOOOR!" She screamed in absolute terror as the blade came down and plunged deep into her belly._

Her hands immediately flew to her stomach as she jolted from her sleep, struggling to catch her breath after the nightmare. Number five.

"It's just a dream." She reminded herself in a whisper, her voice shaky and full of fear. "You're ok little one." She assured her baby before lying down and snuggling close against Trevor who suddenly opened his eyes.

"You alright?" he whispered. She turned her head and looked up at his face through the light of the moon that shone through their bedroom windows and sweetly ran her fingers along his cheek as her breathing slowed to normal. Only he had ever made her feel this safe.

"Yeah" she smiled, not wanting to worry him "I thought I heard Noah crying." Trevor kissed her cheek and snuggled her closer to him, putting his arm around her and, holding her close.

Aroused by the feel of his body against hers, she again turned her head to his, this time to catch his lips, quickly turning her body so that they were now chest to chest as they continued kissing and she snaked her leg around him.

"Make love to me" she whispered breathily, needing nothing more right now than to feel him as close as possible as his lips made their way to her neck. She hadn't needed to ask as he was already putting her on her back, his lips trailing even further down her body, kissing their way to that place between her thighs where he slowly but eagerly made love to her with his mouth, making her come hard; inhaling sharp, quick breaths as her body jerked. When a scream threatened to erupt, she bit her lip so hard in trying to contain it, she tasted blood but even that didn't stop him from taking her lips in a torrid kiss as he pushed his thick shaft inside her and she moaned into his mouth.

* * *

.

The fallout from the Ledger's front page had been huge! The media had a field day with it, further pushing their agenda to prove that the NYPD was completely incompetent for allowing the death of the EADA who was to have been under protective detail. They attacked the Mayor, the Police Commissioner, the DA and when that wasn't enough sensationalism for them, they set their sights on the grieving family after someone from the ME's office leaked the news about Casey's health and pregnancy to the press. This drove everyone over the edge and now for Trevor, in addition to grieving parents, children who didn't understand why their aunt Casey had gone away and a wife who was beside herself with heartache, he had to worry about his brother who was bordering on being suicidal, having sunk so deeply into his sorrow. Casey's funeral and burial on top of the media exploiting her death had destroyed Travis, scaring Trevor to the point where he'd refused to take no for an answer and forced his brother to move in with him, Liv and the kids so that he could keep an eye on him. Olivia agreed with Trevor; even in dealing with her own pain over losing Casey she was still worried about Travis and helped Trevor convince him to stay.

…..

The day Trevor arrived with Travis, the brothers walked into the house and Adrienne and Caden immediately ran out to meet their father and uncle followed by a pale-faced Olivia carrying Noah on her hip. She hadn't seen her brother in law since the funeral the day before and she was suddenly very overcome with emotion as she handed Noah off to Trevor, walked up to Travis and hugged him.

"It's so good to see you!"

"You too sis." he said as he kissed her cheek. She caught a whiff of his aftershave and it went straight to her stomach, further aggravating her morning sickness and causing her to pull back. "Liv, you ok? You don't look too good."

"I'm…" she paused, taking a shaky breath "I'm okay." She promised, even as she felt the nausea getting worse.

"Honey maybe you should…" Trevor started but didn't get to finish as Olivia ran, her hand over her nose and mouth down the hall to the bathroom.

"Mama wun" Noah said

"Daddy, does mama have another tummy ache?"Caden asked

"Yeah bud" Trevor answered as he handed Noah to Travis and headed down the hall to see about Olivia.

"Uncle Travis, I bet you can't find us!" Adrienne teased "Come on Cady, hide!" she called to Caden and the two went running off in opposite directions.

"Okay go" Noah said and pointed. Travis looked at his smiling Nephew in his arms as he listened to his other nephew and niece joyfully laughing as they sought their hiding places and he thought of Casey, recalling that the last time he kissed her was right here in this entryway as she left that fateful night and he thought about their own baby and the life they could have had. He wasn't even aware that he had been so lost in his thoughts until he was brought back by the feel of Noah's hands on his face attempting to wipe the tears that he hadn't even been aware were being cried.

"Thanks bud" Travis whispered. Noah responded by planting a sloppy kiss to Travis' forehead and though the gesture caused Travis to cry harder as he held Noah close to him, he also did something that he hadn't done in over a week…he smiled.

* * *

.

**Sixteenth...**

With all the hoopla surrounding Casey's murder, even someone as deranged as Faust knew when it was time to lay low. The heat was on and he did exactly that – layed low. The FBI had stepped in to lead the manhunt after declaring Faust a serial killer and brought in a familiar face to lead the investigation.

"Everyone" Murphy addressed the squad room. "As you all know, the FBI will now be leading the Faust investigation which means that all NYPD departments involved will now answer to them - in particular, one man who will oversea all operations from this point on. I want you all to make yourself familiar with special agent –"

"Dean Porter!" Fin exclaimed in both surprise and disgust. "What the hell are you doin in New York?" he was not at all happy to see the man he'd served with during his time in the Army Rangers.

"Working. Same as you dect-"

"Sergeant"

"_Sergeant _Tutuola"

"And of all people, they had to send you!" Fin sneered

"When Washington wants something done, they utilize their best" Dean said in his usual arrogant, nonchalant manner, the very manner that made Fin despise the man even when they fought together in Desert Storm twenty-some-odd years ago

"I take it you two are acquainted" Murphy smirked at the obvious tension between the two men

"Unfortunately" Fin rolled his eyes "We served together in the Army and after he went fed, he worked a few SVU cases with us back in the day"

"You make it sound horrible" Dean said as he sat down the box he was carrying at the conference table.

"It was" Fin said, remembering how each time Dean had stepped in on their cases, himself, Elliot, Munch…the whole squad hated the guy. "You were a pain in the ass!" he finished and walked off, not caring to be near the man a moment longer.

"Hi, Amanda Rollins" she greeted, her hand outstretched with a big toothy smile that got bigger as Porter took her hand and shook it. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to let me know!" she was obviously liking what she saw in the 6'2" Olive skinned, dark haired god with the chiseled features standing in front of her.

"I'll keep that in mind" Dean said dismissively as he pulled his hand away "Be a sweetheart and grab me a cup of coffee"

"Wha…"Amanda opened her mouth to protest

"Black, thanks" Dean said, cutting her off without turning to acknowledge the blonde detective as she rolled her eyes and walked away

"Nick Amaro" Nick kept it curt. He didn't care for what glimpse of the man's demeanor he had gotten so far and could see why Fin wasn't a fan.

"Nice to meet you Nick." He said and quickly turned his head in Fin's direction "So uh, where's Benson?"

"Still on that huh?"Fin suddenly jumped back in the conversation as Nick and Amanda looked on quizzically "1PP took her off the case and sent her on leave in light of the circumstances"

"Well, once again those idiots down at 1PP got it wrong. Get her down here; I want her back on this case!"

"Agent Porter, I don't think that would sit well with Commissioner Reagan" Murphy interjected

"Too bad I outrank him. She's the best NYPD has and if I'm gonna get this fucker, I need her. Now get her here!" He demanded.

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

Olivia dragged herself from she and Trevor's bathroom after this today's first round of brutal morning sickness and flung herself across the bed face-down, quickly realizing her mistake as the impact sent pain shooting through her breasts; pain that caused her to draw in a sharp, angry breath but she didn't move. Nine weeks in and she was already over this pregnancy!

She noticed the sound of paws on the bedroom floor, slow at first but then quickly speeding up before Semper came around to the side of the bed and began pushing her snout against Olivia's hand that was hanging from the bed. She could sense that Olivia was in a bad mood and wanted to offer comfort even it that comfort was simply her presence but Olivia just sighed miserably and continued to lie as she was, face down. Semper gave a few more nudges before she gave up and lovingly began licking at Olivia's fingers. that did the trick and Olivia slowly moved her hand from Semper's tongue to the dog's head and began to lightly scratch her behind the ears.

"You're such a good girl; but I'm okay" she assured her when she looked up and into the eyes of her loyal pet and saw the worry they held. Ever since she'd gotten pregnant, Semper couldn't keep away from her and was more protective than ever which is saying a lot for a bullmastiff.

"Go find Jax and play, I'll take you for a walk soon" but even the promise of a walk wasn't enough to make Semper happy when her master looked so miserable and she gave Olivia a questioning look. "Semp, I'm fine" she said while scratching Semper's chin. "Outside" reluctantly, Semper did as she was told and turned, leaving the room as Trevor walked in.

"I brought you some ginger ale" he said as he entered the room carrying a glass half filled with the bubbly beverage.

"I can't" she groaned, still unmoving as he took a seat beside her

"… just a sip?" he tried bargaining

"Trevor, no" she refused, feeling sicker just thinking about the liquid touching her tongue

"Do you feel like nibbling a little something? Toast, oatmeal…eggs?" she pulled herself into a partial sitting position, the idea of slimy cooked oats and egg yolks causing her to dry heave as she vigorously shook her head in protestation.

"stop"

"Liv you haven't eaten more than a few crackers in two days…"

"Because I can't keep anything down" she wept "My own saliva makes me nauseous!"

"I'm sorry, I know. I'm just worried" he confessed. Usually, in spite of her nausea, Olivia would complain of being hungry but that hasn't been the case at all lately. She's not sleeping much, the constant nightmares have her afraid to close her eyes and her paranoia has made her jumpy. As Trevor took her in his arms he wondered if her tears were more about hormones or emotional exhaustion.

"You're holding me too tight!" she complained, pushing him away just as her phone suddenly rang and she angrily grabbed it from the nightstand to answer it. "WHAT?!" she barked.

Hormones.

"Maybe I should call back" Fin said

"Fin, no it's okay"

"You sure?"

"yeah, what's goin on?"

"Your presence has been demanded"

"By who?"

"Feds took over the Faust case, they want you back on"

"What? Since when?" she suddenly perked up. Although she wasn't crazy about the job anymore, getting justice for Jessica meant everything to her and now with Casey having become Faust's victim, she wanted more than anything to be the one to find him.

"I'll get there when I can"

"You take as much time as you need. Trust me, you want to" Fin grinned, anticipating what Olivia's reaction will be at seeing Derek

"What are you not telling me?"

"You'll see"

"Fin, you know I hate surprises." She said as she lay back against the pillows

"Don't I know it!"

"Oh God! I'll see you later." She sighed and hung up, tossing her phone across the bed

"What's that about?" Trevor asked

"The FBI took over and I'm wanted back on the Faust case"

"No!" he said, leaving no room for argument but this was Olivia he was dealing with…

"Excuse me?" she suddenly sat up

"You heard me, no! You are not going anywhere near that case!"

"I'm sorry, are you father or my husband?" She asked incredulously

"I'm whoever I need to be to get it through your head that it's not happening!"

"I haven't agreed to go back but if I did, I'm an adult, it's my decision. Besides, what do you think can happen to me while I'm surrounded by federal agents all day?" she argued as she stood up and quickly got dizzy, Trevor catching her just as she fell.

"I get it okay?" he said softly, looking into her eyes "I understand that you want justice for Casey, we all do…"

"It's more than that. Don't you see?" she again sat down on the bed "This…all of it is my fault! If I had stayed on top of this, kept track of Faust, he would never have gotten out; I would have made sure of it"

"Liv, you can't blame yourself; no one could have known that he would do this."

"But if I have a chance to make it right…"

"You're too close; you're too emotional right now; we don't need to invite any more of this into our lives, we need to focus on healing – all of us!"

"Don't you think I want that?"

"Then let's do it. Baby let's just forget about Faust and his threats. We can take the kids, the whole family and take a vacation; just get away from the stress and heal."

"Vacation…that's how we ended up with this little surprise" she smiled while patting her tummy then looked at him with suddenly sad eyes. "We would have gone through our pregnancies together, would have been having the babies just a couple of weeks apart…you and Travis would have become dads together"

"I think about it too" he confessed "this is why we need a break from all of this, not you being smack dab in the middle"

"Trevor…"

"Liv, this is not up for debate, not when our kids need us. Noah's too young to know what's going on but Drew and Jamie…even though they don't quite understand what death means they do understand that something big has happened and that it's affecting the family in a negative way. We made a vow that we would always put their needs first, always do what's best for them…you working this case while they're going through so much confusion is not what's best for them. They need both of us." she leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. He was right. Her focus hadn't been where she needed it to be and it hurt admitting it to herself. When she felt his hand on her stomach, gently rubbing, she placed her own on top of his, letting her fingers lock with his.

"The baby's first sonogram is tomorrow and if the doctor okays' it, let's fly the hell out of here for a couple weeks." it had to be done.

"Yeah?" he smiled, not believing she'd let him win and mentally logging it in his mind out of surety that it would never happen again and he wanted to remember this moment.

"I'll go down and tell them in person that I won't be working the case."

* * *

.

**Sixteenth…**

Just after 2pm, Olivia stepped off the elevator at the 1-6 with Adrienne and her security guard in tow – an accessory that made her feel ridiculous but she reasoned that one bodyguard was better than the two bickering detectives that had initially been assigned to protect her; neither she or Trevor could put up with the pair any longer and Trevor decided to hire private security, employing the very best from Brian.

"What? They made this place central?" she asked as she entered the squad room, her guard waiting in the hall by the elevators. The place was crawling with agents who'd set up what looked like a situation room in the precinct.

"Pretty much" Amanda said, a huge smile on her face as she walked over to greet her lieutenant. "Feels good to have you back, all this testosterone is drivin me crazy! Hey Drew!" she said and scooped the little girl up in her arms.

"Unfortunately, you're gonna have to get used to it a little longer…I only came by to tell them that I won't be working the case"

"Lucky you…they guy in charge is a real d…" She suddenly remembered that there was a child in the room "How's the family holdin up? I know this can't be easy right now."

"We're dealing…it's a journey." So where the heck is my squad?" Olivia asked looking around "All I see are feds in this place"

"Well, most of the detectives are out following leads, Murphy's down at 1PP, Nick's in court and Fin is in your office with…oh, here he comes now"

"Hey!" Fin smiled as he hugged Olivia" You made it he said before turning to kiss Drew

"Barely."

"You sure about this? It's a lot to deal with now with Casey…"

"I'm not joining the investigation; Trevor talked some sense into me"

"I knew there was a reason I liked that dude!"

"Ha! So the guy running this circus, he in my office?"

"Yep, been waiting all day for you" Fin grinned mischievously "Lemme walk you in…" Olivia looked over at him wondering what was so funny, she was immediately let in on the joke when she walked into her office and Dean Porter spun around in her chair to greet her.

"You have gotta be kidding me!" she exclaimed

"Hello Olivia, it's good to see you." Dean said as he approached her

"_He's _in charge?" she asked Fin incredulously

"Yep" Fin laughed.

"And you couldn't tell me this before I bothered coming?"

"Is that my phone ringing?" Fin said as he left the office and shut the door behind him, suddenly feeling the need to leave.

"It's been a long time" Dean smiled

"Not long enough. Look, I just came by to say thanks for the offer but no thanks!" she said and turned to leave.

"Lemme guess, Stabler still being a jealous ass?" he asked upon noticing the wedding ring that still adorned her finger.

"You're about five years too late. Goodbye Dean!"

"Wait…you and Stabler…done? But if you're single…your ring…"

"I said Elliot was out of the picture, I never said I was single."

"So you're…"

"Very happily married. And it would probably serve you better to focus on this investigation, not my private life."

"I was getting back to that. You really not interested?"

"I am but I have more important interests"

"Novak was your friend-"

"She was more than my friend, she was family!"

"So what could be more important than bringing her killer to justice?"

"Don't you dare try to manipulate me; I said what I came to say and now I'm leaving. Thanks, but no thanks!"

"I never could get past how hot and heavy you and I-"

"There was no you and I!"

"Tell that to the many…MANY screaming orgasms I gave you!"

"We had sex a few times, so what?! Single consenting adults are allowed!"

"Except one of us wasn't very single at all that one time"

"You're delusional!" Olivia said angrily at being reminded of the indiscretion that actually wasn't. About a year after she and Elliot had gotten together, before they were ever engaged they had a huge blowout and called it quits. Dean happened to be in town on an assignment and she'd called him up for the first time in over a year. It happened the one time – and was the last time she'd slept with Dean. She and Elliot eventually made up and from that point on, the only contact she'd have with Porter would be the few cases he would step in on occasionally.

"I never understood why you broke things off…I mean you and Stabler? The man was a Neanderthal; you were definitely too much woman for him but you and me…we could've-"

"Wow! What's it been…eight, nine years since I saw you last? Amazing…you're still the same arrogant, self-centered asshole you always were!"

"I'll own that.

"Find Faust and get the hell out of my city!"

"And I will, but I want you with me while I do it."

"Not happening" she said as she again headed for the door

"I'm giving you a direct order"

"And I'm telling you to go to hell" she said calmly. There were two quick knocks on the office door before it opened and Fin stepped in carrying Adrienne. Olivia smiled.

"Liv, sorry to interrupt but baby girl is getting restless"

"Mommy can we go now?" Drew asked.

"I'm sorry baby, of course we can" Olivia apologized as she reached for her daughter, taking her from Fin's arms and holding her close.

"You have a kid?" Dean asked in semi shock

"Hi" Adrienne smiled at him as she gave a timid wave

"I'll see you later Fin" Olivia said, ignoring Dean as she walked out of the office with Adrienne on her hip.

"Bye uncle Fin"

"Bye baby!" Fin waved before turning back to Dean "She looks pissed. That's a record even for you" he taunted, eliciting a cold glare from Porter.

* * *

.

**Madison square...**

Later at the park, Olivia an Alex sat on a bench watching as Winnie and Drew enjoyed themselves on the small playground.

"Winnie's so good with her" Olivia smiled

"Yeah, she's amazing with her little brothers. I still can't believe she's almost ten."

"Time…"Olivia mused sadly, a long silence following. I haven't slept since…"

"Nether have I; not more than an hour here and there. I can't close my eyes…"

"Without seeing Case. I know" Olivia said as she wiped her eyes "It just doesn't seem real you know? I keep waiting thinking that every day is gonna be the day that I wake up to find that this was all just one big nightmare then I'll pick up the phone and call Case…"

"And she'll call me and we'll laugh about it because we're completely twisted like that" Alex finished through her own tears and she and Olivia laughed in spite of them.

"When she told us she was sick, we tried to prepare ourselves for the day when…it wasn't supposed to happen like this."

"I know" Alex took Olivia's hand and held it tight and there was the silence again. "Liv I'm scared" she whispered, trying desperately to hold back her sobs. She didn't know what she would do or how she would survive if Faust got to Olivia too. Olivia knew exactly what Alex had meant and as she looked over at Drew, the sound of her child's beautiful laughter filling the air, she confessed to Alex three small words as she continued holding her hand, three small words that solidified the crippling fear that Alex already felt.

"I am too."

* * *

.

**Langan home, late that night…**

Again, Olivia lay in bed beside Trevor unable to sleep. She and Alex being able to talk about her fears helped a lot but there was still so much on her mind, so much she wished she could say to Trevor but she couldn't possible lay anymore on him that he was already dealing with, couldn't give him more to worry about. 1:17am…would sleep come at all? She was deciding whether or not to check on the kids for the 5th time when the bedroom door slowly opened…

"Mama?" Drew called in a frightened, tiny voice from where she stood in the doorway. Olivia could tell that she had been crying.

"Adrienne, baby what are you doing up so late?" she asked as she leapt out of bed and went to her daughter, scooping the three year old up into her arms as Trevor began to stir.

"I had a bad dream!" Adrienne wept as she threw her little arms around her mother's neck and buried her face there.

"It's ok now baby girl" Olivia promised, as she kissed her daughter's face "Mama's got you."

"She ok?" Trevor asked

"Just scared" Olivia answered before turning her attention back to Drew "You wanna talk about it?"

"You left me…I couldn't find you" Drew cried, obviously still shaken up by the dream"

"Oh, my sweet girl, it's just a silly dream. I would never, ever leave you; not for anything in the whole world!" Drew lifted her head and looked at her mother.

"You promise?"

"I promise" Olivia smiled as she gently wiped Drew's tears then kissed her cheeks. "Would you feel better if you went to sleep with Daddy and me?" That perked Drew right up

"Can I?" she asked happily.

"You sure can" Trevor said as Olivia made her way back to the bed and when they were settled in, Olivia kissed Drew once more.

"I love you" she whispered in her daughter's ear

"I love you too mommy. Mommy, when can I see the baby?'

"Not for a few more months"

"Are you still making it?" she asked, Trevor Laughed

"Sort of" he answered

"But when will it be ready?"

"When Springtime comes"

"Mommy?"

"What sweetie?"

"Can the baby be a sister?" Drew asked with a yawn

"I'll see what I can do" Olivia laughed, genuinely amused at her daughter's question. She was pretty sure that had it not been for the children giving her a reason to smile every day, she would have gone insane.

"Mommy?"

"Yeah baby?"

"Did I grow in your tummy too?"

"You did; you and Jamie together."

"How did we get in there?"

Both Trevor and Olivia froze as they looked at each other wondering what to say.

"Um…you know what baby? That's actually a daddy question…honey?" she smiled, Trevor's eyes went wide as Adrienne looked over at him, waiting for an answer.

"Well you see sweetie…um…" at a complete loss for words, he feigned a stretch and yawn "Oh wow! Daddy is really tired. How about we all get to sleep and talk about it later?"

"Hmmm, okay." Drew agreed, much to their relief. "Goodnight mommy, goodnight daddy" she said as she curled against Trevor's chest and let her eyes close.

* * *

.

**Sixteenth…**

As he prepared to finally leave for the night, Dean had one thought on his mind: Olivia. Eight long years since he'd seen her last was she was still as beautiful as ever – even more so; and feisty! It was the thing that had drawn him to her when they first met.

"Stabler's finally out of the picture and just that fast she hooks herself up with another loser!" he sighed. "Cute kid though…but how could she not be with a goddess for a mother?" He hasn't been able to focus on anything else since she walked out of here today; he hadn't prepared to be so completely stricken all over again.

"God, she was absolutely glowing!" it had been so easy for her to just move on from whatever it was that they had, to just start a life with Stabler, not caring that she'd broken his heart…he guessed it was his own fault, he'd never truly made it clear how he felt, even when they first began sleeping together, she'd made it clear that it was just sex and he allowed her to think that he could be okay with that but each of the ten times they'd hooked up during those two years, he fell deeper in love with her every single time and even all these years later, he still remembered every inch of her body, remembered how she liked to be touched…those spots that drove her crazy.

Paul Faust wasn't the sole reason that he'd agreed to come back to New York, he had intended to reclaim what he'd let slip through his fingers. She'd never been truly happy with Stabler but now…seeing her with her little girl in her arms, she looked more content than he'd ever seen her and he wasn't sure if he could interfere with her life now as easily as he would have when he thought that she was still with Elliot. What if she was truly happy now?

"One way to find out" he thought aloud as he finished gathering his things, then headed for the squad room.

Amanda was the last one to be leaving for the night.

"Rollins…right?" Dean asked. Amanda turned around, surprised. He hadn't addressed her at all since he'd arrived this morning

"Listen, I want to apologize for this morning. This case has me really wound up – it's excuse for being rude but I am sorry." He didn't mean a single word of what he was saying but it had the desired effect on the blonde and suddenly that big, toothy grin was back on her pale face.

"It's okay…lord knows we're all feeling the stress." She said, suddenly very interested all over again.

"Even more stressful now that Benson won't be here to help us out.

"Well, you know, she's got a lot on her own plate right now. I hate it too but I get it."

"You two close?" he asked

"She's a good friend"

_Bingo!_

"Amanda…can I call you Amanda?"

"Sure…" she was all too happy to have

"I don't know about you but I'm starving and I was planning to have dinner in my hotel suite…would you like to join me for a very late meal? We could go over the case, get better acquainted since we'll be working together"

"Um…I don't have anywhere to be…yeah, I'd like that; just gimme a minute to get my stuff okay?"

"Okay" he smiled. "And call me Dean"

...

**Bryant Park Hotel  
3:44am**

"Oh God, Dean…Dean…DEEEEAAAAAN!" Amanda screamed as her climax ripped through her and Dean rolled off of her, both of them panting heavily.

"That…was incredible!" Dean said then got out of bed and went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom he was wearing.

"The last man to fuck me that good…hell, he died!"

"What?"Dean asked with a laugh as he climbed back under the covers.

"long story that I'd rather not talk about."

"Oh no?"

"No. you took real good care of what I needed…now lay back and let me return the favor" she smiled as she slipped under the covers and before he could say a word, she had wrapped her mouth around the head of his cock.

"I can definitely do that!" he moaned as a huge smile spread across his face. This would be easier than he thought; in no time at all, he'd have all the information he needed about Olivia to decide what his next move should be.

* * *

.

**So, as I did with all of the characters in this story, I decided to take certain liberties with Dean Porter to make the story more interesting. Will he casue trouble for Trevor and Olivia? I'd love to hear your feedback on this chapter so please take a moment to leave a little review (or a big one, I love those, lol!) anyway, thank you all. See you next chapter…the hell returns.**


	10. Closer

**I DON'T EVEN WANT TO DISCUSS WHAT A COMPLETE BITCH THIS STORY HAS BEEN TO ME BUT WHEN I TELL YOU ALL THAT THE STRUGGLE HAS BEEN REAL, PLEASE BELIEVE ME! SO HEAR WE ARE WITH CHAPTER TEN, THE HELL RETURNS, FAUST…WELL, HE'S FAUST AND…WELL HE'S FAUST. NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY EXCEPT DICK WOLF OWNS THE SVU CHARACTERS AND I HOPE THAT YOU GUYS ENJOY THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE IT WAS MY OWN PERSONAL FAUST FOR WEEKS!**

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**Reader Comments**

**Bobbie23 chapter 9 . Sep 13**

**You were right, Dean Porter annoys the hell out of me. On par with Dani Beck, he is. I think you captured his personality with perfection - he is such a prick. I loved the chapter, especially Fin and Drew. "How did we get in there?" So funny. You gave us fluff and now I'm wondering how much that will cost us when the horror returns. Can I request that Porter is Fausts' next victim? - **LMAO, there seems to be alot of that same wish going around!

**SVUAddictTherapyNeeded chapter 9 . Sep 13**

**NO! Ok, I do not like Porter, he is one annoying person! But I also do not currently like Amanda! Well, I love her in your fic, but the show.. I am rambling. But I cannot tell if I am going to like that Porter(douche) is with Amanda or not. I fell like something is off with him. I also love that Liv decided to stay away from the case. But something tells that with Faust, and the creepy character that fool is, he is going to come after Liv. The case will follow her where ever she goes. - **Oh darling, if only you knew!

* * *

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**Three weeks later…**

_He'd gotten restless in the weeks that followed Casey. For over a month he kept a low profile as he planned – stalked and planned for his next two, and final kills but they hadn't made it easy. The cunt judge…It was just a matter of finding the right moment when he could breach her security and get to her but the cop…she was a whole other kind of difficult! _

_In addition to security, she has a husband who never leaves her side…and he's big – a fact that scared Faust but he figured that if it came down to it, he would just have to deal with the guy if all else failed…but he prayed that it wouldn't come to that._

_He had developed a taste for the kill beyond just that of the five women he'd originally targeted. And before a month had fully passed, the urge came again and with no way of getting close to his intended victims, he wandered out into the night to seek someone that no one would miss and who could satisfy his urge. Nothing else mattered, not even the possibility that he may be infected with the AIDS virus. He was past the point of caring._

"_Hey papi, whatchu lookin for?" the young woman in the bikini top and micro-mini skirt asked while loudly and annoyingly popping the gum in her mouth. It was easy to tell that she wore no panties underneath. He was interested._

"_How much?"_

"_25 to suck yo dick, 50 to fuck" she said and licked her already over-glossed lips. _

_Whores! Every single one of them, whether they were walking the stroll or living within a white picket fence, they were all whores and they all had a price! But he would show this little whore; he'd show her good!_

_After he'd fucked her to within an inch of her life, just as she was coming he wrapped his hands around her neck and squeezed and when she realized what was happening and tried to fight, clawing at his hands as it became harder to breathe, he squeezed harder, taking pleasure in her struggle and as her eyeballs bulged from her head and her pulse faded beneath his hands, he felt powerful!_

"_Who knows" he thought "Maybe once they find out that it was me they'll be stupid enough to look away again! Idiot pigs! _

* * *

**.**

"What do we got?" Fin asked as he and Amanda approached Melinda, them having just arrived at the crime scene underneath the subway platform in Spanish Harlem. It was 3am and they'd been disturbed from their respective sleeps; to say that they were both somewhat grumpy was an understatement.

"Dead hooker" Melinda said as she kneeled over the body of the young Puerto Rican girl in front of her.

"Hooker? I got suits older than this girl!" No matter how much depravity the seasoned Sergeant had seen over the years, it never got easier, especially when it came to children and Fin could tell with all certainty that this victim was still a baby.

"15 according to some of the other working girls, Selena Rodriguez, went by the name Heavenly. From the looks of it raped, strangled and dumped." Melinda informed Fin and Amanda

"Christ!" Amanda mumbled

"Fluids?" Fin asked as he looked at the body

"Semen. Vaginal and anal; blood and skin under her nails…she fought while she was dying"

"What psycho rapes and murders a kid then dumps her naked in an alley?" Fin angrily wondered aloud

"The kind who obviously doesn't care about getting caught!

...

After a long night of interviewing witnesses who really weren't since no one saw anything - at least not that they would admit, Fin and Amanda finally made their way back to the house just as the sun had come up over the city and now they were working hard trying to make sense of what little information they could get out of the other working girls who knew young Selena while praying that CODIS would give them a match on the fluids they'd collected.

Now, just after 9am and they had nothing more than when they'd arrived at the crime scene at 3am.

"15 years old and nobody sees or says a damn thing!" Amanda complained as she took another sip of her coffee.

"Until now!" Nick announced as he entered the squad room

"You got something?" Murphy asked

"Yep, went back to the neighborhood, talked to a few people, I got a timeframe and a description"

"How the hell you do that?"Fin grumbled

"…it's a Latino thing" Nick grinned

"I'm afraid what it is, is out of your hands!" Dean interjected as he entered the room

"What are you talking about, Porter?"

"What I'm talking about, Lieutenant Murphy" Dean began while reaching for a bear claw then taking a huge bite. "…is the fact that we got a hit in CODIS. The DNA found in and on Selena Rodriguez belongs to none other than Paul Faust!"

"Son of a bitch!" Rollins exclaimed "he's getting antsy! It's been a month since he got Casey, that's the longest he's gone between kills so far"

"He's deviating from his plan" Murphy added "Psycho's developed a bloodlust!"

"And that's exactly how he'll slip up. He can't get to Benson or Donnelly but he needs to kill" Fin concluded.

"Call 1PP" Dean ordered to no one in particular "Tell them I want more plain clothes patrol on the strolls!"

"On it!" One of the FBI agents answered

"Detective Amaro, give whatever info you got to my guys before you make a move. Rollins, I need a word with you in my office" Dean called to Amanda who got up from her desk and followed him.

"Shut the door" he ordered once she stepped inside. No sooner had her hand released the knob he was on her; pinning her petite body to the wall as he ravaged her mouth with his, them carrying on a full on make-out session like overheated teenagers until they were forced to break for air.

"Miss me?" he asked breathily. She responded by slapping his face so hard that his neck gave a crack as his head went spinning. "I'll take that as a no"

"You son of a bitch! Do you think I'm gonna just get over the fact that you tried to use me?!"

"Is that a rhetorical question? Because after the way you just kissed me…"

"First, you kissed me; second…" she finished the sentence with another equally violent slap to the other side of his face.

He hated to think what she'd do if she knew that sex wasn't what he was actually using her for; he'd only let her think it after he'd gotten all the information he wanted from her about Olivia and Trevor, then dumped her a week ago. But after getting bored with long hours and no way to release his stress and the fact that Amanda was a complete freak in bed, he decided that for the time being, he'd keep her around to satisfy his carnal needs - until he could worm his way back into Olivia's good graces…and her bed

"How long are you gonna hold a grudge?"

"I don't know. How much longer you plan on livin?"

"Okay…I deserve that"

"You deserve a hell of a lot more than a few slaps! If all you wanted was sex that would have been fine, you didn't have to let me think that you actually cared!"

"You're right, I was an ass, so how about a do-over? Amanda; will you engage in strictly platonic sex with me for the remainder of my stay in New York City?" he asked with a smile. Amanda, with a look of disgust marring her delicate features, huffed and slapped him again.

"Ass!"

"Will you stop hitting me?!" they were both distracted by a knock at the door that came just before Nick poked his head in.

"We got another one" he announced, looking oddly at the two with a feeling that he'd just walked in on something.

"Where?" Rollins asked

"Brooklyn SVU called it in, Brownsville. Exact same MO, another working girl"

"You've gotta be kidding me!" Amanda exclaimed as she followed Nick out of the office and Dean let out a frustrated sigh.

"What the hell is goin on with you and Rollins?" Fins voice suddenly cut through the quiet of the office.

"It's called knocking, Tutuola!"

"What the hell is goin on with you and Rollins?" Fin asked again, ignoring Dean who had taken a seat behind the desk.

"Nothing is going on between your partner and me – not that it's any of your business"

"Make sure you keep it that way, you are not gonna mess with her head!"

"Look, whatever you think is happening between Rollins and me is not what's happening so why don't you shut the hell up!"

"I don't need to know the details to know that you're an asshole who can't be trusted! Stay away from her!"

"I don't need this, I have work to do and I'm sure that you do too; close the door on your way out!" Dean didn't bother looking at Fin but could feel the ice-cold glare that Fin shot him before he left the room and slammed the door behind him.

Porter leaned back in his chair as he pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes shut. This case was a complete mess but the way he saw it, it was nothing that he couldn't handle; he had a reputation to uphold and he was determined that he would catch Faust before the maniac had a chance to finish his list – he'd die before he'd see that maggot harm Olivia!

"Olivia…" he sighed wistfully "The one that got away" even he couldn't understand why he'd never gotten over her. He'd always known that she and Stabler would never last and he had come back to town expecting to find them divorced or at least so rocky that the slightest nudge would break them but no, he comes back to find that the asshole is six feet under and not only is she now remarried with three kids – a fact he still can't wrap his head around; but her husband is actually a decent guy who's worthy of having her and after everything that he'd gotten out of Rollins about their life together and everything they'd gone through, he had actually begun having a change of heart about trying to come between the couple, even if it meant losing a second chance with Olivia.

"But hell, marriages fail every day…what's one more? Especially if it gets me what I want" he tried reasoning, but deep down, he knew it was wrong and struggled with his conscience – the one nobody even believed he possessed and do the right thing.

… And I have the idiot blonde to thank for giving me all the info I need to know how to play my hand; should I decide to play it!" Little did he know, Amanda wasn't the stupid girl he pegged her for and had plans of her own to get something she wanted…him!

* * *

.

**Tilden Houses, Brooklyn**

"Imani Jackson, 22 raped and strangled. From the looks of things, I'd say she died near 5am." The medical examiner said to Nick and Amanda when they'd arrived on the scene. The naked body of the young African-American woman was lying on the ground near the garbage pile by the curb where she'd been found underneath several large bags of trash. Amanda took one look at her and…

"Oh my god! I know this girl!" She cried

"From where?" Nick asked

"Last year, she was raped and beaten by a john in Clinton projects; he walked and she went back to her pimp, never heard from her again and now…" she explained to Nick before turning to the Brooklyn detectives "He left fluids didn't he?"

"In and on her and this one's got pubic hair in her teeth. You thinking it's the same guy?" the graying older female detective asked Amaro and Rollins

"You were right, definitely the same MO" Nick confirmed "Looks like another one on Faust!"

...

**Sixteenth…**

"They just found a third body in Queens, the Rockaways!" Murphy announced as he slammed the receiver down onto its cradle. "Same MO as Brooklyn and Manhattan, another working girl"

"I don't get it, three bodies in less than twenty four hours" Dean said as he shook his head in absolute disbelief

"Less than twelve hours" Murphy corrected.

"How is this possible? We got the NYPD and the FBI all over this so how the hell does this guy keep slipping past us?" The anger and frustration in Dean's voice was unmistakable

"Guy's a modern Houdini" Fin added.

"And making a complete fool out of us…" Murphy again "I can only wonder what his next trick will be!"

* * *

.

_The last whore proved to be difficult…she fought him hard, not as hard as the lawyer cunt had but harder than the black whore did earlier. Still, he got her! Too bad she looked just like his fucking ex wife, if she hadn't he wouldn't have needed to bash her face in until he broke every bone. Now, instead of the pretty blonde whore he'd picked up Far Rockaway an two hours ago, she looked more like bloody play dough and after dumping her body on the roof of a building, he went about his way. _

_Now as he stood in his run down room, staring at the last two pictures on his wall, the final pieces to his murderous puzzle of revenge and he wondered how much longer before it would be complete._

"_These__ bitches can't avoid me forever…I just have to figure out a way to get past the fucking security guards, fuckers follow then everywhere they…" he suddenly paused "Paul you fuckin idiot!" he said, hitting himself upside the head as it became clearer._

"_They're with the whores everywhere they are… but not where they aren't." a wicked smile crept upon his face; he'd just found his way back to the puzzle! Now, the only problem was deciding on when._

"_Nothing will keep me away from you Olivia!"_

* * *

_._

**Langan home**

"Do you have any idea how amazing you feel?" Trevor groaned as his lips found Olivia's neck and nipped at her pulse point while he continued driving into her. She whimpered as she continued to rock her hips against his, meeting each of his thrusts and now, by the way her walls had begun to twitch around him he knew that she was close.

"Just like that baby, come for me" he demanded, his eyes locked on hers as she moaned beneath him.

"I…" she gasped unable to even speak, her words cut short by the feel of his fingers on her clit, her back arching, eyes rolling as her orgasm exploded but Trevor continued his pace, tripling the intensity of her climax and sending her completely over the edge; she sank her teeth into his shoulder; her nails into his back as she writhed beneath him and he happily went over with her, giving her every drop of him while they kissed each other with consuming intensity before quietly drifting off to sleep in each others' arms.

It had been just yesterday since the family had returned from their vacation - three glorious weeks in Aruba that hadn't been so glorious for Olivia with her constantly being sick but this morning she'd woken up feeling great and with Trevor's parents having had insisted on taking the children after the family vacation ended, she and Trevor took full advantage of the situation.

They'd been enjoying a fitful sleep when after a while, Olivia began dreaming again.

_She was back at her old house; the one she'd grown up in and she had just walked out of her front door when she noticed Elliot standing on the sidewalk but it was strange; Elliot was wearing a mask, plain and white, one with no expression._

"_What are you doing here?" she asked_

"_I came to see you."_

"_Really? Because I have a restraining order that says otherwise!" _

"_Restraining order…Liv, you forget I'm ex NYPD? I still have a lot of cop friends; that restraining order might as well be written on a donut for all it's worth!"_

"_and you seem to forget that I'm still NYPD, and I will have your ass behind bars so fast, you'll be bent over in the shower before you can even drop the soap!" she didn't turn to look at him as she made her way down the street…that were vividly colored like bright rainbows._

"_I just want my wife back!" he yelled. She stopped just as she was about to cross the street._

"_I'm not your wife; we're not even friends anymore." She reminded him as her baby began kicking._

"_You will always be mine!" _

"_I am done with this ridiculousness Elliot! Whether you like it or accept it, this is Trevor's child! I am with him, and I love him! Why can't you just let me be happy?"_

"_Because that baby should have been MINE! It wasn't enough to DEFILE yourself by fucking him, no, you had to make it worse by letting him knock you up with his bastard! YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING ABORTED IT! You will always be mine Olivia…ALWAYS! You will never get away from me, you will never escape me and no matter what you do, I will always be in here" he said in a sinister whisper as he tapped his finger against her temple._

Olivia inhaled sharply, deeply, her hand immediately reaching for her baby as her eyes shot open and she looked over to see that she was still lying in Trevor's arms. She quietly got up and made her way into the bathroom where she threw cold water on her face and ran her hands through her hair, still shaken by the dream. She hadn't thought about Elliot in years and now suddenly she was dreaming about him and had no idea why, nor did she know why she suddenly felt the need to scrub every inch of her skin but she went straight to the shower to do just that.

….

Back in the bedroom, Trevor turned to reach for her but was only met with cool sheets, causing him to open his eyes. Immediately, his ears were met with the sound of water running from the shower and he was able to relax. This mess with Faust…it kept him on edge all the time. Travis, even though he tried as hard as he could to go back to some semblance of normal, he was still destroyed by having lost Casey to the madman and Trevor couldn't help but be afraid that he and the children would suffer the same fate with Olivia and that was the one thing he knew in his heart that if it did happen, he simply could not bear!

Sure, he'd been doing all he could to keep Travis holding on in the month since Casey had died but truth be told, if the shoe were on the other foot Trevor knew that he wouldn't survive and grew more in awe each day when he saw the way that Travis tried to keep going, even getting up and going in to the office this morning for the first time in a month. Still, Trevor knew that no matter how many protective measures he took to ensure Olivia's safety, as long as Faust was out there, he was a threat and Trevor wouldn't rest until the man was put away; or dead!

…

Later that afternoon, the two of then lay out by the pool on one of the double loungers, Semper beside Olivia and resting her head on her thigh while Jax lay at Trevor's feet.

"You hear that?" Trevor asked

"No…what?"

"Exactly. No one is crying, or fighting, or whining or making enough noise for 30 kids when they're just a group of three." He laughed

"Quiet; yes…I could get used to it. But just imagine when this one comes and there are four of them." she sighed as her fingers trailed lightly over her stomach

"We still have a few months before that becomes a reality and I choose to live them in denial"

"No denying, look at this…" she said as she pulled up her t shirt and ran her hand over her very pronounced bump "I literally just started my fourth month and I'm huge!"

"I'll have you know that your pregnant body to me, is the sexiest thing in the world." he smiled seductively as he intertwined his fingers with his wife's and leaned in to kiss her.

Jax decided that he didn't like the contact and lazily got up from where he lay and parked himself right in between Trevor and Olivia. Whereas Semper stayed glued to Olivia since she'd gotten pregnant, Jax had become protective to the point where he didn't like anyone touching her except for the children. After Trevor had no choice but to let go of Olivia's hand and unlock his lips from hers to accommodate Jax, Jax then looked back at Trevor with what appeared to be a smug grin on his face as he settled himself, snuggling against Olivia's tiny belly.

"Oh, you think that's funny, huh?" Trevor asked. Jax bucked his head in a shrug like motion and settled back against Olivia who couldn't help but laugh as she scratched his head while Semper continued to lay still, unaffected.

"He's just being protective, aren't you boy?" she cooed to the canine who ate up the attention.

"You know, I could always make you leave" Trevor taunted. Jax quickly raised his head and shot a look to Olivia that said _You wouldn't let him do that, right?_

"Daddy's only kidding" she assured "But you might wanna be nice!"

Quickly heeding Olivia's advice, Jax turned his attention to Trevor, raising up to put his two front paws on his chest and gave him a big sloppy _I'm sorry _lick to the face.

Trevor smiled as he threw his arms around Jax and hugged him. "We good?" Jax responded with a hearty '_WOOF_' before laying his head down on Trevor's chest.

"Yeah he's not moving" Olivia laughed.

"Oh yeah he will" Trevor was reaching down to the grass to pick up the ball that lay beside the chaise. "Here Jax, go get the ball" he said, making sure he had Jax' attention before throwing the ball far across the massive span of the back yard, making sure that Jax would have a tough time finding it. Jax happily ran from the lounge and went about retrieving that ball, Semper running after him and Trevor pulling Olivia closer the second they were gone.

"Smart move" Olivia grinned as she cuddled against him, letting out a sigh as she lay her head down on his chest.

"You know, we don't _have_ to stop at 4…" Trevor said, picking up their conversation from where they'd left off

"Ha, nice try baby, but this little Langan will be our last!"

"What if it's a boy?" Trevor smiled with a look about him that reminded Olivia of Jamie when he'd beg for something she wouldn't give him and she laughed.

"Then it's a boy"

"BUT…Drew really wants a sister…"

"Then we'd better pray REALLY hard for a girl!" she teased, lightly raking her nails down his torso. "I'm horny again" she whispered against his neck while her fingers continued trailing downward and into his shorts

"Three times in one day…feels like old times" he grinned then moaned as her fingers wrapped around his shaft.

"Get me off without making us late for Liz's dinner and I'll make it four when we get home!"

"Deal!" no sooner than their lips touched they were interrupted by the phone ringing from inside the house. "You've gotta be kidding me!"

"Really does feel like old times" she grumbled, quickly kissing his lips before moving to get up

"You really want to answer?"

"Want to? No, but it might be the kids" she said then sprinted inside, grabbing the phone and seeing on the display that it was Fin.

"This had better be good!" she answered

"Hello to you too; how was your trip?"

"Uh, between severe morning sickness, exhaustion and chasing after three kids all day? Peachy; how's the case coming?"

"That's why I'm calling, thought you'd like to know Faust is at it again, we got three dead working girls in the morgue killed in the last twelve hours, Brooklyn, Harlem and Queens. The youngest only fifteen"

Olivia felt her stomach drop, cold fear coursing through her and rendering her silent for a moment.

"Baby girl you there?"

"I…yeah…and you're sure it's him?"

"We got a positive hit from CODIS on the first vic, still waiting on the other two but we're pretty sure it's him"

"He's getting restless" she whispered, running her hand through her hair as that night one month ago suddenly flashed through her mind and she could see Casey's lifeless eyes staring back at her.

"And we both know that that's when they get sloppy. Don't worry about this baby girl, we're gonna get him!"

If only they'd known the trick that Faust had up his sleeve tonight.

* * *

**Judge Donnelly's home...**

In spite of the tension at the whole situation with Faust, Judge Donnelly's dinner party was a great distraction for everyone to take their minds off him even with it serving as a memorial to Casey. That night they all sat around and shared their fondest memories; Liv, Trevor, Travis, Alex, Brian, Fin, Munch and several other friends and colleagues whose lives had been touched by having had Casey in them.

It was after a couple hours that Travis had found himself so full of emotion that he needed to step away to collect himself and now sat outside on the stoop, looking up at the night sky, focusing on one star in particular that shone especially brighter than all the others and he knew that it had to be her.

"Doll I'm trying…every day I'm trying but it's so hard when every day I miss you more." He hung his head for a moment, letting his tears fall before looking up at her again. "It's like your funeral all over again in there; everybody has such beautiful things to say about you, such beautiful memories but all my memories do are haunt me and make me wish that I could turn back the clock, go back to that night and…why can't I be where you are? I should be with you and our son, there's nothing for me here. there's no re-"

"Hey; you alright?" Brian asked as he and Trevor stepped outside and sat down beside him on the stairs.

"I um…I'm having…it's; with everyone talking about her it's just…" Travis could barely find the words.

"I know" Trevor said as he put an arm around his little brother "And we're here for you."

"That's right" Brian agreed, Travis was so overwhelmed, he just hung his head again and cried.

…

"I'm so glad you all could make it!" Elizabeth said to Olivia and Alex, as they bid their goodbyes in the main hall while Brian and Trevor brought the cars around "And the baby, congratulations; you're almost caught up with this one!" referring to Alex while patting Olivia's bump

"I think I'll let her win" Olivia grinned.

….

After the guests had all departed and the wait staff was done cleaning and left for the night, Elizabeth let out a long sigh. The day had been a tiring one between court and the dinner party but now there was nothing left to do but take it easy. There were no cases to hear tomorrow so she could just sleep in she thought as she turned off the lights and headed upstairs for a long, hot bath.

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

Inside the main house, Trevor and Olivia were lying in each other's arms, having made love as soon as they'd gotten home. Olivia was already drifting off to sleep but Trevor couldn't close his eyes; he lay there in the dark gently sweeping through Olivia's mass of dark waves with his fingers as a feeling of absolute panic began washing over him. Olivia, whose head was on his chest, was pulled from her sleep by the now frantic beating of her husband's heart and she worriedly reached to caress his chin as she looked up at him.

"What's wrong?" she asked

"I don't know…something doesn't feel right" he answered through now heaving breaths, frightening Olivia who quickly sat up

"Baby?" she questioned as she reached for the bedside lamp and turned it on.

"I need to check on Travis!" his tone was urgent as he got up and quickly threw on his pajama pants not bothering with a shirt or shoes. Something inside him knew. "Call an ambulance" he instructed Olivia before he ran from their bedroom and down the stairs.

…..

He got to the guest house to find the door locked and he began pounding against it as he frantically called out to his brother only to be met with silence.

"Travis...TRAVIS OPEN THE DOOR!" he begged but there was only more silence. By now the security guard Mike, had heard the commotion and had come around back.

"Everything ok Mr. Langan?" Mike asked when he saw how panicked Trevor was.

"Help me get this door open!" Trevor pled. Mike didn't hesitate to comply and the two men threw their bodies against the door, feeling it give on first impact. On second impact, the frame shattered and the door flew open. "Travis!" he called before turning to Mike "Make sure the ambulance gets through"

"I got it"

"Travis!" Trevor continued calling as he made his way through the house and to the main bedroom, horrified to find his brother unconscious on the floor and barely breathing. After they'd gotten home, being completely distressed and thrown even deeper into the abyss he'd been trying to pull himself out of, Travis had swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills and washed them down with a bottle of vodka.

"No, Travis no!" he cried and without wasting even a second, Trevor got down on the floor, pulling his brother's limp body into a sitting position in his arms and shoved his fingers down Travis' throat, once, twice and finally a third time, forcing him to heave and vomit the poisonous contents of his stomach all over himself and the floor as he held his brother, tears streaming his own face.

"You're gonna be alright little brother" he sobbed and kissed the side of his face "I should have never left you alone but I promise you're gonna be fine!" he swore, just as Olivia appeared in the doorway, heartbroken and rendered speechless at the sight in front of her.

* * *

.

**Judge Donnelly's home…**

Feeling relaxed and tired, Elizabeth climbed out of her bathtub after a luxurious hour-long soak and was eager to pull on her nightgown and sink beneath her covers. She was toweling off and she never heard his footsteps, didn't feel his presence as he got nearer. After wrapping her towel around her slender body, she turned around to exit the bathroom and found herself face-to-face with the last person she would see.

"Paul Faust" she exclaimed without expression, refusing to let him see the absolute terror that gripped her every nerve right now.

"It's good to see you too" he smiled menacingly and before she could speak another word, he'd snatched a handful of her hair in his fist and smashed her face into the bathroom mirror twice then snatched her towel away from her body as he dropped her to the floor, her head hitting the edge of the bathtub as she went down and knocking her unconscious.

"Now that's no fun" he said as he began unbuckling his belt "But I'll take it!"

* * *

**Next chapter gets worserer…way worserer!**


	11. Resignation

**OKAY SO UM…THIS IS CHAPTER ELEVEN AND I KNOW THAT YOU GUYS ARE WORRIED ABOUT WHAT WILL TRANSPIRE IN THE COMING...THERE'S NO WAY TO SOFTEN ANY OF THIS; JUST LET IT RAIN! DICK WOLF OWNS THESE SVU CHARACTERS AND UM…YEAH!**

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**Reader comment**

**Bobbie23****chapter 10.****Oct 5**

**First, I'm going to wait 'patiently' to see what happens - am I going to be reading through my fingers? I like how you've put across Faust's spiraling blood lust, it just makes me wonder how it's going to escalate. I'm so worried about Travis, I hope he pulls through and gets the help he needs with his grief. I adore how you interweave the fluff and the horror. Finally - Amanda should have hit Porter harder.**

LMAO! She'll hit him where it counts! As for the rest…um, I apologize for the inhumanity of my actions?

* * *

_His plan had been brilliant and he was only angry that he hadn't thought of it sooner. While her security was busy following her to the courthouse, her home was left unguarded and he was free to slip inside and wait for her; of course he hadn't counted on the house later being filled with caterers and wait staff who'd arrived even before she herself had gotten home so he picked one of the many unused extra bedrooms upstairs and he waited for what seemed like an eternity._

_As the day wore on and turned to evening he could hear house becoming fuller as her guests arrived – cops, lawyers and more judges, all of them with their fancy jobs and fancy words sitting around talking about the redhead he demolished last month...man he wished that he could have another go at her even at the risk of catching what he later learned she had. Still, he wasn't worried about disease, not that he planned to live long anyway; no, as soon as his list was complete he'd be offing himself anyway. There was no way he was going back to prison so he had nothing to lose. _

_Finally after what felt like forever, the guests departed and he was alone with the esteemed judge – not so high and mighty now that he had her spread wide and fucking her like a madman naked on her bathroom floor; he only wished that she'd been conscious so he could hear her scream but he played the hand he was dealt! He'd just ejaculated all over her and zipped his pants when he heard her security detail enter the house and in the quiet he could hear their footsteps as they performed a check of the lower level of the home._

"_FUCK!" he screamed in his head. He was nowhere near finished with her but time was suddenly against him. He quickly grabbed his knife, looking over his shoulder as he heard the footsteps coming nearer and hurriedly drew the blade across her throat, dropping her head when he saw the blood begin to pour from her neck and without looking back he dropped the knife and hurried down the back stairs as he heard security approaching the front to check the second floor. The very second her opened the back door, the alarm sounded but he didn't care about that, he'd done what he came here to do and as he ran off into the night he laughed with an incredible feeling of accomplishment at knowing that there was just one final piece to his puzzle!_

* * *

_._

**Hospital, White Plains…**

"How's Travis?" Olivia asked the moment Trevor emerged from the doors of the treatment area in the emergency room. She was still a mess from having seen him unconscious in Trevor's arms after trying to take his own life; it was one thing to see these kinds of horrors on the job but when it touched her own family it was a whole other ballgame.

"He's still unconscious but the doctor says he's gonna be fine" Trevor assured her as he took her in his arms and held her tight. "The doctor says if I had found him just a few minutes later…" he trailed off, too choked up to even think about having found his little brother's corpse and instead, held his wife closer, comforted at feeling her in his arms.

"You got to him in time, that's what's important. I knew he was grieving I just didn't think he'd…" Olivia couldn't stop her tears.

"None of us did. He was upset tonight…why did I leave him alone?"

"Baby, you didn't know"

"I'm his big brother, it's my job to keep him safe; Liv I failed him" he cried, breaking down in her arms

"Shhhhh! Baby you didn't…you didn't" she soothed, plying his face with kisses. "Travis knows how much you love him, how much we all love him; he just misses Casey so much and he doesn't know how to deal with it…he just wants the pain to stop. This is not your fault." She held his head in her hands while looking him in the eyes and wiping his tears with her thumbs. He nodded and took a deep breath that he blew out through his mouth.

"It's late, you shouldn't be up"

"I'm fine"

"It's after 1AM, you need to rest for the baby" he reminded her as he skimmed his fingers over her tiny belly "he or she needs you to sleep"

"And I will when I'm tired, but right now you need me here and I'm not going anywhere"

"Liv…"

"Baby, pick your battles" she advised

"Why did I have to marry the world's most obstinate woman?" he sighed as he pulled her into his arms.

"Because you love this obstinate woman"

"Yeah, yeah!" he teased, his mood softening as he leaned in and kissed her. "But you don't win that easily. Excuse me, nurse" he called to the RN passing by.

"Yes ?" the young woman turned and smiled, eager to help.

"It's been a long night for us and my wife is pregnant, is there somewhere she can maybe lie down and rest for a little while?"

"Trevor!"

"Of course there is. Why don't you both follow me and we'll get her nice and comfy."

"Thank you but my husband worries too much" Olivia said while looking back and giving Trevor the evil eye.

"It's no problem, Mrs. Langan." The nurse assured her as they made their way down the hall, followed by Olivia's security guard "congratulations on the baby, how far along are you?"

"Thank you. Four months…" Olivia smiled.

… … … … … … … … …

"_You think this is a joke? Is that what it is, you think I'm a joke? I already told you; if I can't have you, he sure as hell can't! You understand that Olivia? You are mine, or you are no one's!" Elliot screamed. "That baby should have been MINE! It wasn't enough to DEFILE yourself by fucking him; no you had to make it worse by letting him knock you up with his bastard! YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING ABORTED IT!"_

"_I'm not doing this; you stay the hell away from me!" she demanded and ran away from him. suddenly, everything around her had gone black and a door appeared before her she opened it to see herself lying in a hospital bed with Trevor sitting beside her…_

"_Trevor? Where's the baby?" _

"_Liv, honey…"_

"_Trevor where is the baby?" she asked again, this time there was desperation in her voice_

"_Sweetie, try to calm -" his eyes were filling with tears._

"_Oh God, where is my baby?!" tears began spilling down her face "TREVOR, WHERE IS MY BABY?_

"_She didn't make it." he said quietly as tears ran down his face._

"_NO!" she cried and sprang out of bed. Trevor tried to hold her back but she fought him hard until her body gave out and she collapsed in his arms screaming. "NOOOOOOOOOO!" she shrieked again and again, hysterically. _

"_MY BABY! OH GOD MY BABY, MY BABY, MY BABY!" Her sobs and screams were vicious as they tore from her and her gown quickly soaked with blood._

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

"CHLOE!" Olivia screamed as she shot up and opened her eyes. In spite of her protests, she had fallen fast asleep the moment her head hit the pillow but now sat up, holding on to her baby as she looked around the dark room trying to compose her breathing, her body shaking.

Trevor happened to be just outside, having been on his way in to check in on her and immediately ran inside when he heard her scream.

"Liv!" he called as he got to her and pulled her into his arms and she threw hers around him "Baby, what is it?"

"He was screaming again that I should have aborted her!"

"Who was screaming?"

"Elliot…I had the same dream yesterday, only this time I was back in the hospital and you told me she was gone!"

What she said caught him complete off guard and he drew in a quick breath, not knowing what else to say and worried that this may be her mind starting to recover the lost memories, Trevor pulled her tighter to him while silently praying that that she wasn't remembering; that her mind would continue to suppress it all. With everything that was going on right now, he wasn't sure how, or, if Olivia would be able to handle facing Chloe's death all over again.

"It's just a dream, he can't hurt you" he promised, kissing her against her temple as he rubbed her small belly. "It's okay baby, they're just dreams"

…especially having to face it and find out that her ex husband had purposely killed her unborn child!

* * *

.

**Mercy Hospital, NYC…**

Alex came rushing into the emergency room, Brian by her side and ran straight to Fin who was gathered with Nick, Murphy and a few uniformed officers.

"Fin!" she cried. He quickly turned around, a look of sorrow on his face.

"Hey man" he greeted Brian

"Hey"

"What happened?" Alex asked

"Looks like Faust got to her; security found her in her bathroom raped, throat slit"

"Oh God!" Alex sobbed as Brian put his arms around her from behind "Is she…?"

"We don't know yet. They took her into surgery a couple of hours ago" Murphy answered

"So, what? We just wait?" she cried

"Not much else we can do babe" Brian said. Alex turned her head to look when the doors to the waiting area opened

"How the hell could you let this happen?!" She screamed at Dean Porter the moment he walked in

"Counselor, we're dealing with a madman. I didn't 'let' this happen anymore than you 'let' him kill EADA Novak on your watch!" He sneered, causing Alex' eyes to fill with tears at the painful reminder.

"You son of a bitch!" Brian yelled as he lunged at Porter and grabbed him, pinning him against a wall.

"Still thinking with our fists are we Cassidy?" Dean said nonchalantly.

"Yeah, and they still hit pretty damn hard! Don't you EVER talk to my wife that way!"

"Brian don't…" Alex begged as she pulled at his arm to no avail.

"She's right man, he ain't worth it!" Fin agreed

"You might wanna listen to them" Dean advised. "Now I'll give you three seconds to take you hands off me before I charge you with assault of a federal officer!" Brian didn't budge, just stared Porter down with hatred.

"Come on man, let it go." Nick said softly

"You're still the same intolerable asshole you've always been!" Brian seethed as he let go of Dean.

"Next time, I'll knock your goddamn head off!" he promised then turned and put his arm around Alex, pulling her close. "I'm sorry babe" he apologized and kissed the top of her head.

"It's okay."

"Can I do something?" he asked, knowing how hard this situation was for Alex. Throughout their professional relationship over many years, Liz and Alex had formed quite a bond and Alex loved the older woman very much. "Do you want me to call Liv?"

"No…no babe, it's late. Thank you but I don't want to bother her until we know the prognosis, the baby's taking a lot out of her and she needs the rest."

"Okay…then can I get you something?"

"You're here, that's all I need…god, this is gonna be another shit-storm when the media catches wind!"

Porter sighed loudly and rolled his eyes.

"What are you doing here anyway?" Murphy asked

"CODIS got a hit on the swab taken from Donnelly… it's Faust."

"Oh God!" Alex cried

"That means Donnelly's our victim and we need everything you guys have, starting with her security. We need to know how Faust got in that house with two guards on patrol! As for you, counselor…"

"Excuse me" Alex said as she ran off, shaking and in tears.

"Al?" Brian called after her and followed while Murphy walked outside to take a call that had just come in on his cell.

"What's her deal?" Porter asked

"Her deal is you bein a complete ass!" Amanda barked

"Detective, a word…" Dean said without looking at Amanda and walked off

"Sorry, I'm busy" Amanda sneered

"That was not a request!" Dean said haughtily and continued walking. Amanda sighed and looked at Nick and Fin before going off to follow Dean.

… … … … … … … … …

In the hospital chapel, Alex and Brian sat in one of the back pews…

"Babe, it'll be okay"

"But it won't. Brian he got to Liz…now there's just Liv"

"He won't get to Liv!" Brian said with surety, cutting her off. He couldn't even fathom such an outcome.

"Just like we thought he couldn't get to Casey… or Liz"

"Al don't do this to yourself, Liv will be fine"

"You don't know that"

"Babe, you cannot make yourself crazy worrying about 'what ifs'"

"How?" she asked as teas rolled down her face. "He took Case…she's dead. And Liz is lying on an operating table with her throat slit and god knows what else! He got to them; he found a way and he got to them because he's determined…the same way he's determined to get to Olivia…I couldn't handle that!" she threw herself into his arms he held her all the while wondering how he could possible ease her mind when he had to deal with his own mind swimming in doubt.

… … … … … … … … …

"What the hell was that?!" Porter demanded as he pulled Rollins into an empty bathroom and locked the door.

"What was what?"

"Whatever your issue with me, I am your superior and you answer to me which means I demand that you show me the proper respect. Is that understood?"

"Go to hell Porter. Is THAT understood?" Amanda asked with a smug grin on her face and a defiant look in her eyes.

"Oh I understand…" he said in a low, suggestive tone as he stepped closer to her

"Oh yeah?" she teased and took a step back

"Yeah" he grinned and leaned in, crashing his lips against hers in a passionate kiss that continued for a long moment before she pushed him away. "What are you doing?"

"You don't think I'm gonna make it that easy for you, do you?"

"You did the first night"

"Cocky bastard."

"You love my cock-iness"

"And I can find another just as quick as I found yours…who's to say I haven't?"

"After the many, MANY magnificent orgasms I gave you…I don't think you want another"

"Why agent Porter, if I didn't know any better I'd say you sound a bit pussy whipped!"

"What?"

"You want it bad, don't you?" she continued teasing. "I'll tell you what, I will let you bend me over that sink and fuck me silly if you answer me somethin truthfully" Dean was practically sweating with desire at this point.

"And what if I don't want the sink? What if I want to fuck you senseless right here against this wall?"

"You can have it any way you want it if you're honest" she bit her lip as she slid her hand down his stomach and between his legs to rub his now raging hard-on through his pants, making him swallow hard and shudder. She had him right where she wanted him.

"A..Ask away!" she smiled at knowing that this would be way easier than she thought.

"How long have you had feelings for Olivia and why are you trying to use me to get to her?" she asked, the lusty, seductive tone now completely gone from her voice

"I…what?" he was completely caught off guard and could do nothing but stammer as he struggled to find words that wouldn't make him look like a total ass. "Who…I don't know…"

"What I'm talkin about? Like hell you don't! Since I've never seen you in all the time I've been with SVU, I'm guessin that whatever went on between the two of you goes way back and I see that you haven't gotten over it.

"I can explain"

"Don't bother. I knew what you were doin the second you started askin me questions about her and her husband."

"Then why did you bother answering? And why'd you continue to sleep with me?"

"Because I was horny and wanted to get in your pants! And because I was hoping that if you knew how amazing her life is right now you'd rethink tying to interfere! Stabler was an ass who treated her like shit…he treated a lot of people like shit and he got exactly what he deserved because of it but she's found someone who truly makes her happy and you come back here after God knows how long trying to spark an old flame without thinkin about what you're doin!"

"Amanda…"

"I saw the way you looked at her that first day you got here; it suddenly made sense why you were so desperate to get her back in on the investigation. I also saw the look of hatred on her face when she stormed out of her office, she wants nothing to do with you!"

"She's confused"

"No, Dean, I think you're the one who's confused. I don't know what went on between the two of you back then and to be honest, I don't care but you've gone this long without it…"

"Because I was trying to respect the choice she made love someone else!"

"Then respect it now!" Amanda yelled. She's happy; she has the family she's always wanted and a husband who worships the ground she walks on. Stay away from them!"

"What if I don't wanna stay away?" he asked flippantly, causing Amanda to shake her head, not believing how glib he was.

"We're not gonna do this dance. Back off!" Amanda warned, leaving no room for misinterpretation; eyes looking through him as she unlocked the door, then turned and walked out of the room.

* * *

.

**Langan home…**

"I know, but we just have to trust that he knows what's best for himself right now; he'll be fine" Olivia assured Trevor as they walked in their front door just after 8am, Jax and Semper running to greet them.

"Hi sweeties!" Olivia smiled as she kneeled to pet and kiss them both. It had been a long night at the hospital, one that resulted in Travis making a huge decision this morning.

Even in spite of his grief, Travis knew in his heart that Casey wouldn't want him to be this way and after surviving his suicide attempt, he vowed to make a sincere effort to get better to honor the memory of the woman he loved so much and knew that Liv, Trevor and their parents; no matter how much they loved him, couldn't give him the kind of help he needed and decided to have himself checked into a wellness facility upstate for six weeks.

"I know, I just…he's my little brother, I should have done better for him" he said as he scratched the dogs behind their ears. Semper and Jax lovingly ate up the attention.

"Honey, you did all you could, and he knows that"

"I hope so." He pulled her close and held her. "You hungry?" he asked as they walked toward the kitchen

"Starving!" she replied just as the doorbell rang "I got it"

"No, it's okay, I'll get it" he protested

"Baby, you're here; security's right outside, I can answer the door" she grinned.

… … … … … … … … …

"That was quick" Trevor said while grabbing eggs from the fridge when Olivia entered the kitchen carrying a large envelope.

"Certified mail…if you cook those I'll vomit." She reminded him upon seeing the carton. He quickly put them back while she took a seat at the counter and grabbed an apple and took a big bite. "Rob and Sara…"

"The couple renting your house?"

"Yeah. They sent some mail that came for me" she said, opening the large envelope. She read the letter inside, smiling at the short, friendly correspondence then removed the smaller padded envelope from inside.

"Okay, we seriously need to go grocery shopping." He informed her as he looked through the fridge for other breakfast options and found nothing. She offered him her apple and he leaned in and took a bite.

"Oooh, let's go now; cookies!" Olivia said with an excited gasp, having a sudden craving as she dropped the envelopes onto the counter.

"Cookies?" he laughed "you sound like the twins"

"The baby wants them." she said innocently, looking at Trevor with her big brown eyes while rubbing her bump.

"I will go to the market, you go upstairs and rest" he said, leaning in to give her a quick kiss on the lips

"I will, just as soon as I'm done cleaning the guesthouse" she promised and took another bite from the fruit in her hand.

"I'll take care of it when I get back"

"Babe, you can't do everything, you're gonna burn out! Besides, dry vomit…mom job! Go; hunt…gather…bring me food!" he gave a laugh

"Okay, be back soon." He kissed her one last time then helped himself to one more bite from her apple before walking out of the kitchen.

"Chocolate chip!" she called after him

"Oatmeal Raisin?" he called back from the hall

"Funny!" she yelled "come on guys, let's go clean" she said to the dogs who happily followed her out the back door.

… … … … … … … … …

A little over an hour and ½ later, she had cleaned the guesthouse pristinely. The other rooms barely needed much, just a bit of tidying that she did in less than twenty minutes, but Travis' bedroom was a complete disaster and she'd wasted no time in getting it done. The floor had been scrubbed and waxed, trash picked up, walls washed down, linens changed and the soiled ones thrown into the wash. Now she had just finished folding the sheets and towels and stopped to stretch her now aching back, pressing the fingers of both hands into it while letting out a deep breath.

"NOW, I'm tired!" she sighed before picking up the laundry basket and heading to the linen closet as her phone rang. "Al, hey"

"Is this a bad time?" Alex asked.

"No I was just putting laundry away" Olivia answered, shutting the closet door after quickly shelving the sheets and towels. "What's goin on?"

"I um…Liv, it's not good"

"What…?"

"Don't be angry with your squad, I asked them to hold off on telling you until we got word from the doctors."

"Doctors? Al, you're scaring me!"

"Liv after the dinner party last night…we don't know how but Faust…"

"Faust?" Olivia cried, suddenly feeling sick, devastation setting in and she took a seat on the sofa

"He got into Elizabeth's home…"

… … … … … … … … ...

_He was becoming antsy; why hadn't he heard anything about the judge? He knew for a fact that her guards had discovered her body so why nothing in the news? Why no reports of her death? What kind of game were they playing? He'd hated that he'd been rushed – no chance to take pictures for the Ledger and the audio was unremarkable; not much to sensationalize with just the sounds of his own grunting as he fucked a woman who was unconscious!_

"_What are you fuckers doin?" he wondered aloud. Though it hadn't been his aim when he began this mission, he had grown accustomed to the media attention and he now craved it just as much as he craved the thrill of the kill and if they wouldn't pay attention, he'd just have to make them pay attention and with his next kill, his final act when he got to Olivia, he would go down in history!_

"_Let's see them ignore me when I cut that baby out of her womb and leave it at the front door of the Ledger…I think I'll send them her head right along with it!" he grinned._

* * *

_._

**Mercy hospital…**

A couple of hours later, Trevor and Olivia arrived at the ICU to be met in the hall by Alex.

"We got here as fast as we could. How is she?" Olivia asked.

"Critical…they think he must have gotten spooked when he heard security coming, when he slit her throat he missed her missed her jugular; she was in surgery all night, coded twice but she's alive"

"Barely…" Olivia whispered as she looked at Liz lying in the small room, tubes and monitors everywhere and a respirator pumping air in and out of her lungs. The woman she'd grown to respect and love so much over the years- this beautiful, wise, strong and often intimidating woman now lying here looking so frail and small.

"Will she…?" Trevor turned to Alex as Olivia stood motionless, staring through the glass.

"The doctors say that if she can get through the next twenty-four hours she may have a chance, but right now it doesn't look good" Alex explained. "Her brother is on his way, he just touched down at LaGuardia."

"Take me home" Olivia suddenly spoke up, turning to face Alex and Trevor. Her voice was dull, expressionless, as was her face.

"Honey…" Trevor began.

"I can't do… I can't be…" she was trying hard to keep her breathing steady. "Just take me home."

"Honey are you okay?" Alex asked. She understood better than anyone what this was doing to Olivia and was worried at seeing her best friend coming undone, which was exactly what was happening; Liz's attack was the proverbial straw and although she tried to mask it, Olivia was breaking right in front of her eyes.

"I'm fine!" she lied using every ounce of her strength to fight the tears that desperately wanted release; she wouldn't allow it. Trevor looked over at Alex nervously and saw that her eyes held the same concern he felt.

"It's okay honey, come on" he said as he put his arm around his wife, feeling as her body trembled so slightly, it couldn't be seen, only felt. Olivia leaned in to his touch and let him lead. She was exhausted emotionally, physically and so afraid; even right now wrapped in her husband's arms, the one place she always felt safe, she was sick inside because she knew that no matter how long they held it back it was inevitable – she would become this madman's victim and though she didn't know when, she prayed to god that she would be able to safely deliver her child into the world before Faust took her life!

* * *

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**I know, apologies do me no good at this point but how about a quick review to tell me how you feel? And please no twitter spoilers, thanks for reading.**


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